Casting Coup Tuesdays: The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey

Let's start out small, intimate, with but two characters to cast.

It had to have been many years ago -- before middle school, certainly --  my mother read us a picture book called The Christmas Miracle of Jonathan Toomey. It's very short, probably only a couple dozen pages, including illustrations, but it never fails to knock me out. Susan Wojciechowski and illustrator PJ Lynch pack so much subtlety, beauty, hurt and hope on every page, he who comes out dry-eyed is missing a piece of their heart. Truly.

So, the story! It's about a carpenter who does not deal with people, shuts himself away from the world, unhappy and alone, hating Christmas. One day, a widow and her son arrive with a proposition: to recreate a beloved Nativity set. Toomey reluctantly acquiesces, little realizing that the widow's son is keeping a watchful eye, with vocal opinions on how to make the perfect Nativity display. Of course, there's more to Toomey than meets the eye; secrets are uncovered, connections are made, and the reader is left weeping with joy and the spirit of Christmas.

I actually once wrote and appeared in an adaptation for my church's Christmas service, playing the role of the son. We used the Nativity set from home as a prop, since the resin figurines were modeled and painted to look like woodcuts. Even better, Lynch's illustrations in the book are an exact match for our family set. We've had that set forever, long before the book came out in 1995, a great coincidence that tied me closer to the story. 

Some of you may have heard of the film version, a straight-to-DVD release that came out in 2007. Tom Berenger starred with Joely Richardson, and it features an appearance by one Miss Saoirse Ronan. I have yet to see the film, partly because I haven't been able to find out, and partly because I have my own idea of what Jonathan Toomey and the Widow MacDowell look like. Let me share it:

WIDOW MACDOWELL

Who is She: The widow who hires Toomey to recreate her Nativity set. A sweet woman, a good mother and Christian, her kindness helps to warm Toomey's heart.

My Choice: BAFTA Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (No Country for Old Men), Indie Spirit Nominee for Best Actress (Two Family House), SAG Award Winner for Best Ensemble (Gosford Park, No Country for Old Men)

Kelly Macdonald (Finding Neverland, "Boardwalk Empire")

The widow is a young woman, I think, with warmth and kindness overflowing. Macdonald, who I've been a fan of since 2001's Gosford Park exudes that quiet, gentle beauty needed for the role.

JONATHAN TOOMEY

Who is He: A gruff carpenter who tries to ignore the Christmas season. At first put off by the widow and her son, he grows closer to them as the set nears completion. Of course, he also keeps a mysterious photograph in his desk...

My Choice: Academy Award/Golden Globe/SAG Award Winner/BAFTA Award/Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actor (The Fighter)

Christian Bale (Pocahontas, Flowers of War)

Besides his ability to sport a masterful beard, Bale is a strong performer able to tell everything about a character with his eyes and physicality alone, a great skill for a role like Jonathan Toomey. I would compare it to his quiet, noble turn in 3:10 to Yuma, really.

Any of you read the book? Anyone convinced to? It's quite lovely, and available for purchase on Amazon.

As for music, how about a John Denver tune? I really think it could apply to Toomey's backstory, carving of the figurines, growing closeness with the boy. It's also a helluva beautiful song:

The season is upon us now
A time for gifts and giving
And as the year draws to its close
I think about my living

The Christmastime when I was young
The magic and the wonder
But colors dull and candles dim
And dark my standing under

Oh little angel, shining light
You've set my soul to dreaming
You've given back my joy in life
You' ve filled me with new meaning

A savior king was born that day
A baby just like you
And as the Magi came with gifts
I've come with my gift too

That peace on earth fills up your time
That brotherhood surrounds you
That you may know the warmth of love
And wrap it all around you

It's just a wish, a dream I'm told
From days when I was young
Merry Christmas little Zachary
Merry Christmas ev'ryone

Hollmann Holiday Extravaganza: IT BEGINS

You're still here, are you?

Yes, it's been an unusually long absence -- my last post was a full month and ten days ago -- but oh! The things I have been doing! Working long hours (even Thanksgiving) at my current place of employment, catching up with all the films out in theaters (or on DVD), keeping abreast of the awards season, watching the films of 1957 for my next Oscar Series (even that was delayed as Tammy and the Bachelor sat unwatched for a week and a half). It's been a month of blood, sweat and tears, but December is here and I am ready to embrace the Holiday Season.

Yes, I'm a few days late, but I've always tried to keep the tradition of Hollmann Holiday Extravaganza alive! This year, join me celebrating my favorite time of year with some stories, music and (oh, of course) MOVIES.

Consider this an overture:

Christmastime is here

Happiness and cheer

Fun for all, what children call their favorite time of year

Snowflakes in the air

Carols everywhere

Olden times and ancient rhymes of love and dreams to share

Sleighbells in the air

Beauty everywhere

Yuletide by the fireside and joyful memories there

Christmastime is here

Families drawing near

Oh that we could always see such spirit through the year

Oh that we could always see such spirit through the year.....

Casting Coup Tuesdays: The Man Who Came to Dinner

DAY SEVEN OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

Today's Holiday Casting Coup is one that I've always wanted to do.

Years and years ago -- I was probably still in elementary school -- I fell in love with The Man Who Came to Dinner. It's the story of popular radio personality Sheridan Whiteside, who arrives in a small town for a dinner with one of its bigwigs; I think it's a publicity thing or something. Anyway, on his way out, he winds up breaking his leg when he slips on some ice, forcing him to remain with his hosts. Only then do they realize that Whiteside is a temperamental, tyrannical, childish man prone to lobbing insults at anyone and everyone in his path.

Written by George S. Kaufman and Moss Hart, the original play was based on their experiences with their friend, radio personality, essayist, critic and founding member of the Algonquin Vicious Circle Alexander Woolcott. The legend tells us that Woolcott stayed at Hart's for a weekend and absolutely terrorized everyone, servants and family alike, even writing a note upon his leaving to assure Hart that it was "one of the most unpleasant times I have ever spent". Hart told Kaufman about the experience, saying, "Can you imagine if he broke his leg and had to stay?" Thus the story was born.

I was exposed to it, like many of you I imagine, through the magic of film. The 1942 film starred original Broadway star Monty Woolley as Whiteside, in one of those performances that audiences adore and critics appreciate, but divides the actual Hollywood people: Orson Welles (who later did a made-for-TV version) and Nathan Lane (star of the Broadway revival) thought Woolley's performance to be awful and misjudged, respectively. Actors. I disagree, but I can understand Lane's displeasure with the performance, thinking Woolley played it too mean. I get that. I love it, but I get it. Bette Davis, who played Whiteside's secretary marvelously, thought the direction was unimaginative, and was forever disappointed that first choice John Barrymore was too drunk to play the role.

Well whatever. Woolley is fantastic, and The Man Who Came to Dinner is a Christmas tradition in my house. My mother and I try to catch it whenever it's on, and TCM obliges annually. It's a true Christmas movie, taking place from the week before Christmas on through the 25th of December. Yes, friends, there's a Christmas Day finale, as well as a Christmas Eve radio broadcast featuring a boys' choir and several live penguins. The exchange of gifts plays a crucial role in the narrative, especially where it concerns Lorraine Sheldon and Aunt Harriet; if you don't know what I'm talking about, see the movie!

So, why recast something if I'm already a great fan of the original? Because (a) I would like to see a less mean-spirited Whiteside, and (b) that's what I do! Let me know what you think:

JOHN & SARAH

Who Are They: The butler and cook, respectively, of the Stanley Home. Long employed by the snobbish and tyrannical Mr. Stanley, they not only welcome the relief of Mr. Whiteside's company -- they positively dote on him.

My Choices:

Zeljko Ivanek (Hannibal, In Bruges) and Cleo King (Dogville, The Hangover)

I like them is all. Cleo King is funny, and boy it would be a relief to see Ivanek at least smile. Without irony, I mean.

AUNT HARRIET

Who is She: Mr. Stanley's sister, a batty lady with a secret past who adores Mr. Whiteside.

My Choice:

Ellen Greene (Little Shop of Horrors, Leon)

Greene can play crazy without going full Crawford. She also looks high-class, as Aunt Harriet should.

MISS PREEN

Who is She: Mr. Whiteside's nurse, a patient woman who finds it difficult to maintain her poise amongst her charge's verbal abuse.

My Choice:

Kristen Schaal (Toy Story 3, Going the Distance)

Funny without being distracting, though she can deliver when it's her time to shine, which works for Preen's eleventh-hour speech.

DR. BRADLEY

Who is He: Local physician who wants Mr. Whiteside to help him work on his memoirs of being a country doctor.

My Choice: Golden Globe Nominee for Best Actor in a Musical/Comedy (Foul Play)

Chevy Chase (Caddyshack, Christmas Vacation)

His recent turn on "Community" only reminds me that he's still got it, and works well as a member of an ensemble.

MR. & MRS. ERNEST STANLEY

Who Are They: Hosts for the dinner Mr. Whiteside came to. It is their home where he breaks his leg, and it is their home where he is forced to spend his convalescence. Meek Mrs. Stanley does her best to keep everything pleasant, but Mr. Stanley is a bit cantankerous, resenting Mr. Whiteside's manners and his intrusion into their lives.

My Choices: He's an Academy Award Winner/BAFTA Award/Golden Globe Nominee for Best Supporting Actor (Adaptation), Indie Spirit Nominee for Best Male Lead (Lone Star) and SAG Award Winner for Best Ensemble (American Beauty).

She's an Academy Award/Golden Globe/Indie Spirit/SAG Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (Pieces of April) and SAG Award Nominee for Best Actress (The Station Agent) and Best Ensemble (The Green Mile, The Station Agent, Good Night and Good Luck)

Chris Cooper and Patricia Clarkson (Married Life)

I love them. We know she can be harried, he can be domineering, and they can both be funny while doing it.

BEVERLY CARLTON

Who is He: A British actor/writer/songwriter (based on Noel Coward). A good friend to Maggie and Whiteside, especially Maggie; he tries to stop Lorraine, an old enemy, from getting her hooks into Bert Jefferson.

My Choice: BAFTA Award Winner/Academy Award/Golden Globe/SAG Award/Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Actor (A Single Man), SAG Award Winner for Best Ensemble (Shakespeare in Love), Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actor (Easy Virtue)

Colin Firth (Bridget Jones's Diary, Then She Found Me)

Funny. British. And a star, which actor characters should be. Do the math.


BANJO
Who is He: A friend of Whiteside's, crazy, ready with a joke, direct with women. Based on Harpo Marx, Banjo is a professional funnyman who also tries to stop Lorraine.

My Choice: Golden Globe/SAG Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actor (Quiz Show), Indie Spirit Nominee for Best Actor (Box of Moonlight), Best Supporting Actor (Five Corners) and Best Director (Mac)

John Turturro (Do the Right Thing, Transformers)
Great actor who can do zany comedy quite well: look at O Brother, Where Art Thou, or even at his somewhat comic role in Quiz Show. He could do that Harpo leer, too!


BERT JEFFERSON
Who is He: Local reporter who Whiteside actually admires, since Bert's quick-witted and charming -- he's also an aspiring playwright. Bert takes a shine to Maggie, and she to him, sparking a romance that disturbs Whiteside. What will he do without Maggie's service? Sweet and funny, his good looks come straight from central casting.

My Choice:

John Krasinski (Smiley Face, Away We Go)
Boyish and handsome, straight from central casting. Also possesses fine comic timing and wit. Also, I think we can imagine two women fighting over him. Man, what an under-appreciated talent.


LORRAINE SHELDON
Who is She: A pretentious actress with designs on a British lord. Shrill and irritating, she looks down on all those around her, except for Whiteside. Maggie hates her, especially when she starts to get her hooks into Bert Jefferson. A ruthless lush with sluttish tendencies.

My Choice: Academy Award/Golden Globe/SAG Award Winner/BAFTA Award Nominee for Best Actress [in a Musical/Comedy] (Shakespeare in Love), Indie Spirit Nominee for Best Actress (Two Lovers), SAG Award Winner for Best Ensemble (Shakespeare in Love)

Gwyneth Paltrow (View from the Top, Proof)
Her recent stint on "Glee" reminded us just how hilarious she can be, and she could send up the perception of herself as a pretentious, holier-than-thou star. She seems like a good sport about those things. Lorraine is a high-class looker, too, and Paltrow, like her mother, just oozes with class.


MAGGIE CUTLER
Who is She: Whiteside's secretary, the only person who can successfully challenge him. He positively depends on Maggie, the woman whose whole life revolves around keeping his schedule in order and reading his thoughts. Maggie is tired, though, and when she finally sees happiness int he form of Bert Jefferson, she leaps for it.

My Choice: Golden Globe Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (Irreconcilable Differences)

Drew Barrymore (TV's Grey Gardens, Going the Distance)
She's already ravishing in 1940s attire. An accomplished comedienne who has played these business-y types before (Never Been Kissed, Fever Pitch), Drew may not seem like the most obvious choice for a Bette Davis sub-in, but she's definitely the best for this role. Warm, funny, smart; she's got all the tricks she needs to play Maggie Cutler.


SHERIDAN WHITESIDE
Who is He: The man who came to dinner, a celebrated writer/essayist with friends on every continent, a friend of the president as well as convicted felons. He encourages joy and freedom in the servants and children, but is also a tyrannical man. He is not a mean person, but viciousness just comes naturally to him. Utterly dependent on Maggie, he tries to prevent her from leaving by inviting Lorraine over to seduce Bert. The man is brilliant, caustic, and funny...and one of my personal heroes. Based on Alexander Woolcott.

My Choice: Academy Award/SAG Award Nominee/BAFTA Award/Golden Globe/Indie Spirit Winner for Best Actor [in a Musical/Comedy] (Lost in Translation), Indie Spirit Winner for Best Supporting Actor (Rushmore)

Bill Murray (The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, Get Low)
I feel like Murray's career has been a series of lovable cynics, men who aren't mean-spirited but naturally vicious. It's a difficult balance, but Murray's built his whole career out of it. He's funny and fantastic, and always generous to his co-stars. I don't know how much truth is in those reports of conflict on the Charlie's Angels set, but Murray and Barrymore are pros. He'd own this role, and he looks more like Woolcott than Monty Woolley.

Any ideas of your own? Got your own dream Whiteside in your head? Did I miss the mark with Lorraine (of course not!)? Are you a fan of The Man Who Came to Dinner? Let me know!

Snow! Snoooow!

DAY SIX OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA:

Ladies and gentlemen. Friday night, I was in...a snowball fight.

Maybe you don't know the power that statement has for me. I grew up in South Florida, where the last snowfall was in 1977, when my parents were high school and I...I was not yet a thought. The furthest north I've gone is Tennessee, in the middle of August. I spent Christmas in Georgia one year, and the sight of a frozen mud puddle was novel enough to have my attention for what felt like a half an hour. The only snow I've seen is the production design in movies. There was hail once at my elementary school, but it took me a while to realize it.

So me? In a snowball fight? A rarity indeed.

Ok, so it wasn't exactly snow. My school threw a Winter Wonderland carnival, transporting in something like 200 tons of ice or something. The ice was blown through this ice blower operated by a man standing atop a diesel truck. At first, he blew directly into the crowd; this was abandoned when it was realized that firing ice cannonballs into people's faces was probably not the best idea. Anyway, there was a nice field of slush right in the middle of the lawn, and we're a bunch of young adults, so what do you think happened?

After getting hit in the head and thigh, I responded by lobbing a few at one guy's chest, another's knee, and someone else's shoulder. The adrenaline rush! The badassery I felt! Holding that freezing cold ice in my hand as I packed it into a ball, winding up, throwing it the way Dad taught me instead of the way I usually did! Just watching people do it was a thrill, but to actually participate? It was everything Calvin and Hobbes promised it would be.

And they promised a lot

Eventually, we were ordered to stop throwing snowballs due to injuries. Actually, I did wind up seeing a guy holding a towel to his face with a puddle of the deepest red blood around his feet. Then we tried building a snowman, to no success at all. Then...oh my God, then the magic happened. The guy running the ice blower finally pointed the thing straight up into the air and...

Only imagine that's me instead of Winona Ryder. Ah, actually, just imagine it's Winona Ryder. She's prettier. Man, I totally thought I was going to marry her when I was a kid. I still say she deserved the Oscar for The Age of Innocence. Anna Paquin was good and all, but Noni...sigh...

Christmas magic? You bet your boots it was. I won't soon be forgetting that night, the night my school gave us...a winter wonderland:

Sleigh bells ring, are you listening
In the lane, snow is glistening
A beautiful sight, we're happy tonight
Walkin' in a winter wonderland

Gone away is the bluebird
Here to stay is a new bird
He sings a love song as we go along
Walkin' in a winter wonderland

In the meadow we can build a snowman
Then pretend that he is Parson Brown
He'll say are you married
We'll so no man,
But you can do the job when you're in town

Later on we'll conspire 
As we dream by the fire
To face unafraid
The plans that we made
Walkin' in a winter wonderland

Puppies for Christmas

DAY THREE OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

 

I just wanted to take this opportunity to link to a Christmas essay from last year written by my friend Tom. I'm sure many of you read his blog, or recognize him from the comments section (I count him and Andrew K as my "Blog Buddies", if you will). If not, why not start right now? He wrote a beautiful and thoughtful post about animals at Christmastime, including a humorous picture of his beloved beagle Maggie in her winter coat and a creative theme his husband came up with for their Tree. Take a look.

While we're on the subject of animals, let me say this: I do beseech you to think carefully before giving someone a pet for Christmas. I know there's nothing more magical than the look on a child's face as s/he holds a brand new puppy/kitten, but animals are living creatures. They shouldn't be a pleasant surprise, they shouldn't be under the tree, they shouldn't be gift-wrapped. Not even metaphorically. Kids can be fickle, and a pet is a big decision. I know of instances where "Christmas pups" work well, but it takes responsibility. Tom does good work at the Buddy Foundation, an animal shelter in Chicago, and I do urge you to get your pets from a shelter, but make sure you can take care of them first. I'm sure there's nothing worse than seeing a dog returned because the Christmas novelty has worn off.

And yet, the only dog Christmas songs I could find are all pro-puppy-for-Christmas. Of course. But just remember: the holiday season is to be enjoyed responsibly.

Soft brown eyes that seem to say
Stop a while, I want to play
Would you, could you, do please stop
He's a lonely pup in a Christmas shop

Thank you lady, thank you sir
Is there someone else that you'd prefer
He's not selfish, just a flop
Though he wags his tail in a Christmas shop

Mister Santa, if you would
Send him someone, oh so good
Someone who will take him home
For ev'ryone to see

Christmas time, a Christmas tree
With a happy family
Pity him, he's got no Pop
He's a lonely pup in a Christmas shop

Mister Santa, if you would
Send him someone, oh so good
Someone who will take him home
For ev'ryone to see

Christmas time, a Christmas tree
With a happy family
Pity him, he's got no Pop
He's a lonely pup in a Christmas shop

Lovely, but Still...

DAY TWO OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

Occasionally I write about movies. This may be news to some of you. But did you know that some of my favorite movies are Christmas ones? Miracle on 34th Street, Love Actually, The Nightmare Before Christmas, A Muppet Christmas Carol: these are Christmas films that are part of my own personal canon of Great Cinema, not just Holiday Treats. I always look forward to catching a movie with snow and mistletoe; luckily, they're in large supply.

This year, the surprise Christmas film was Lovely Still, a romantic comedy about a lonely old man (Martin Landau) who falls in love with the woman across the street (Ellen Burstyn). It's a film I'd been looking forward to seeing but never got the opportunity. It barely got a release, even though there were rumors of an Oscar campaign for Landau, and its DVD release was practically a secret. I didn't even know it was a Christmas movie until I streamed it on NetFlix, but I'm sure anyone who did weren't in the mood for it during its limited run in May. But hey, here I was, finally getting to enjoy it, and just in time for the season!

Christmas-wise, this movie's pure. It's not Toy Story, with a Christmas stinger, nor is it Hardware, whose Christmas setting is incidental, except where William Hootkins' rants come in. Lovely Still does not mess around: it is a Christmas Movie. The film opens with Martin Landau's character wrapping a single present for himself and placing it under his Christmas tree. The entire story takes place between the 19th and 25th of December. There's a subplot about a book of homemade Christmas recipes. There's Christmas shopping, a Christmas Eve party, and a Christmas Day finale. Even dream sequences are made up of images flashing across a haze of red, green and gold light. And, of course, there's a healthy supply of Christmas tunes, both new and traditional.

To paraphrase Up in the Air: All the things you probably hate about Christmas movies -- the shopping montages, the soundtrack of holiday standards, the gift exchange epiphanies -- are warm reminders that I'm home. And this movie was going to give me all that and Ellen Burstyn? I was tickled by this notion. Could there be a better setting for a romance between an elderly couple than in the most hopeful of winter months? The cinematography, the acting, the soundtrack (while sometimes annoying) let me know that I was in for a quirky, feel-good ride. Indeed, about 40 minutes in, I realized that though the film was flawed (the sound mix is abysmal), though Landau was kind of overdoing the quirk, I liked it. Ellen Burstyn's beautiful performance certainly helped, and Elizabeth Banks was doing some remarkably subtle stuff. So what if Adam Scott's character was poorly-written? So what if the Christmas shopping segment didn't work? It's still a good time.

Naturally, I anticipated the dark turn to come. This a movie about old people; chances are, one or both of them is going to display some sign of illness or other. Burstyn's character takes pills, looking at herself tragically in the mirror. Beautiful moment, ok, it's great. Landau's character has a freakout at a Christmas Eve party. Makes sense, he's shown that he's a little weird, a little unstable, maybe he's like Movie Autistic or something. There's even a scary yet wonderful moment on Christmas Day, when Burstyn is horrified by one of the gifts under the tree. The once vibrant colors immediately desaturate, and the subsequent confrontation is jarring. Once again, though, the performances deliver something great, so I was fine. Everything was getting wrapped up in a nice bow.

Then comes the twist. Oh, yes, there's a twist, and thought I kept thinking, "I wonder if this happens..." I kept hoping this wouldn't. But it did. And boy, does that twist raise more questions than it answers. Burstyn (see the trend here?) executes it beautifully, and her performance alone makes it almost credible. Personally, though, it didn't gel. Maybe it makes more sense after a second viewing. I'm willing to give it a shot.

So yeah, I'd say give it a watch. It's enjoyably wholesome entertainment with a few great performances. The score's irritating sometimes, but sometimes it's some of the year's best. And there's three stand-out Christmas moments: a department store Christmas tree with snow falling; a sled ride so beautiful I was reduced to tears; and a dance in the snow on Christmas Eve, which is what I want every Christmas romance to have. And hey, we learn that Christmas just ain't Christmas...without the one you love:

Christmas just ain't Christmas without the one you love.
New Year's just ain't New Year's without the one you love.

Underneath the mistletoe, I saw a face all a glow,
Last year this time.
Now I stand all alone and my house is not a home
Without that girl of mine. Oh.

Christmas just ain't Christmas without the one you love.
And New Year's just ain't New Year's without the one you love.

12 o'clock and all is well and I was doing oh so swell,
Last year this time.
Going shopping for presents together would make it last a week,
But it would never.
It was a waste of time. Oh.

Christmas just ain't Christmas without the one you love. Oh, oh, oh.
New Year's just ain't New Year's without the one you love.

Oh, oh.
Christmas just ain't Christmas without the one you love. Oh.
And New Year's is just another lonely night without the one you love and ohhhhh, no.
(Christmas just ain't Christmas) No, no. (without the one you love.)
I'm gonna be lonely.
I'm gonna be lonely,
(New Year's just ain't New Year's...)
Oh, oh, 'cause I said I need your loving. Need.
Christmas just ain't Christmas without the one you love. Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh.

Stave One: Hey, It's Christmas Time!

DAY ONE OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

Ah, and finally we arrive at my favorite time of year! No, not Oscar Season, though I do adore that time as much as any movie-obsessed blogger. I'm speaking of the Christmas Season! Egg nog will be consumed! Tree-shaped cookies will be baked! Mistletoe will be hung! And for about a month, everyone will (theoretically) be full of love, joy and kindness!

And, of course, here at the Silver Screening Room, is the Hollmann Holiday Extravaganza, which is what it sounds like. Every day* means a new post about Christmas, a Christmas song, and a Christmas video, usually of said song. It's 25 Days of pure joy, and you're all invited!

So join me all month long and have a Happy Holiday!

Christmas time is here again 

Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
It's been 'round since you know when
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
Christmas time is here again
It's been 'round since you know when
Christmas time is here again

Christmas time is here again
Come on everybody
Christmas time is here again
I wanna hear it loud and clear
Christmas time is here again
Do it for me one time
Christmas time is here again
Do it for Mark
Christmas time is here again
Do it for Jesus, Jesus loves you
It's been 'round since you know when
Christmas time is here again

Christmas time is here again
O-U-T spells out

Christmas time is (Merry Christmas to you all) here again
Christmas time is (Peace and love everybody) here again
Christmas time is (You know it makes sense) here again
Christmas time is (Peace on Earth) here again
It's been 'round since you know when
Christmas time is, Christmas time is here again
O-U-T spells out

Christmas time is here again
C-H-R-I-S-T-M-A-S spells Christmas
Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas

*Ahahaha I've never kept that schedule!

Stave Twenty-One: In Which Someone a First Christmas is Celebrated

DAY TWENTY-ONE OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

This Christmas Eve will be a very special one in my household. My sister had a baby in March, the first of us to do so. Now, my parents and I are visiting family on Christmas Day, but my sister and her daughter will be staying in town, so we're spending Christmas Eve with them. Which means I'll be there for my niece's First Christmas.

Obviously, I don't remember my First Christmas, so I can't really provide an anecdote about that. I do remember some early Christmases, though, so I am happy to be able to share this experience with my niece. We even brought out some of our stuffed animals of old to let her play with. I could not help but recognize the Rudolph my aunt gave me during our Atlanta Christmas: Plaid shirt, green pants, brown suspenders, and a torn red nose without cotton. There is also the train set I got a year later. It's a whole set with engine, coal, pine trees and caboose; as I got older, I would play Agatha Christie with my Micro Machines on that train. It doesn't really run, but it's neat to look at. And what better gift to give a child on Christmas than a worn hand-me-down?

In all seriousness, though, it really means a lot to me, my old traditions becoming her new traditions. She's not even a year old, so she doesn't know the significance of these items to my life. Besides, they have someone new to entertain. I hope she enjoys them as much as I did. Hell, I hope she dresses as snazzily as I did (green sweatsuit with a T. Rex on the shirt).

At least I get to say that I was there for my niece's First Christmas. That we sat together by the tree as the angel's wings changed color, that she stared at the Santa Claus figurine perplexedly, a little frightened by this strange giant with the odd suit -- because, let's face it, the first time we see Santa we freak the hell out -- that she fell asleep in her Mama's arms after we all exchanged gifts. Christmas is all about the family, and I am more than happy to spend it with its newest member.



It's baby's first Christmas,
It's somethin' to see,
Mommy and Daddy,
Trimmin' baby's Christmas tree.
Baby's big brother,
Is busy with his toys,
He's shinin' up the chimney,
For Santa Claus!

It's baby's first Christmas,
And oh, what a joy,
Shopping all around,
For every pretty toy.
It's a very special Christmas,
A blessing from above,
It's baby's first Christmas,
A Christmas full of love!

It's baby's first Christmas,
And oh, what a joy,
Shopping all around,
For every pretty toy.
It's a very special Christmas,
A blessing from above,
It's baby's first Christmas,
A Christmas full of love!

Stave Sixteen: In Which a Star is Born

DAY SIXTEEN OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

Today....we put up the tree! Dad, Sarah and I did the lights. Becky, Sarah and I put up ornaments. I put up the angel with help from Mom and Dad. And my niece, who is celebrating her first Christmas this year, put the cloth ornaments in her mouth. If only Virginia were there; then it would have been a real family affair.

There was a moment of pause in the proceedings as we decided whether to go with the Angel or the Star. Sarah demanded the Angel, for our star is...well, it's a little tacky. Gold glitter, with Christmas lights shining like a laser show from inside. It matches nothing. At least the fiber optic angel looks ready to sing "Gloria", with outstretched arms reaching to the heavens. It's a bad-ass angel.

But that star. It doesn't even have a proper stand. It's cardboard with masking tape attaching it to the star. The whole thing is tacky and haphazardly constructed.

And yet, there is a kind of charm to it.

Truth is, I miss the star. We used to have a silver Star of David on a spring stand. I don't remember when we switched, but I remember why. The Star of David was coming apart. There were two halves that fit together, and they finally stopped working as a team. It was just when I had learned the significance of that particular Star, too. After all, if you're going to have a Star lead to the King of Jews, might as well be the right kind, you know what I mean?

That star hurt, though. It had sharp points. It was a very stabbity star, if you know what I mean. Like, ninjas could use it. Perhaps that was part of the mystique for little me. This great big Holy Star that would hurt you if you touched it. After all, were not Aaron's sons smote when they entered the Holy of Holies in the Temple? Does Alan Rickman not speak for God so that our heads won't explode? The idea of a stabbity Star of David just made sense to me.

It also made me feel very cultured and ooh-la-la. "We may celebrate Christmas, but we have an in with the Jews, with their wine and their ashen heads and their lamb's blood!" Mom explained to me that we used a Star of David because it was the Star the Wise Men followed, and it was the symbol of Jesus' family. He was, after all, descended from either Solomon or Nathan, sons of King David, who slew Goliath and fell in love with Bathsheba as she bathed on the rooftop, thereby leading him to send her husband to lead a charge that would kill him in battle. I love the Old Testament.

Ah, the point. The point is, an angel is nice and all, what with messages to Mary and shepherds and all the hymns about their awesomeness. But when I get a Christmas tree, I'm going with a Star. It's what the Wise Men followed, it symbolizes Jesus's lineage, and they make more effective weapons.



Twinkle twinkle little me
I have a lonely life
I’m the star upon your tree
That makes your christmas bright

Twinkle twinkle little me
I left the milky way
Just so I could be with you on Christmas day
Christmas brought me where you are
And heaven gave me life
I’m that friendly little star
You wish upon each night

Twinkle twinkle
Oh, twinkle twinkle little me
I have a present too
If you give unshelfishly
And make a wish come true
I’ll always shine on you

Twinkle little me
Twinkle twinkle little me
Ooh, Christmas brought me where you are
And heaven gave me life
I’m that friendly star
You wish upon each night

Twinkle twinkle little me
I have a present too
If you give unshelfishly
And make a wish come true
I’ll always shine for you

Twinkle little me
I’ll always shine for you
Twinkle little me
I’ll always shine for you

Stave Thirteen: In Which Parties Are Ruminated Upon

DAY THIRTEEN OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA:

A couple of days ago, some friends of mine held a Classy Christmas party! It was wonderful, of course. The men wore neckties, sports jackets and sweater vests; the women wore cocktail dresses and heels. We danced, we sang, we played a cool party game where you rip paper into a Christmas tree behind your back (no peeking!)

I won.

I think of all the traditions, Christmas Parties may be my favorite. There seems to be an extra air of camaraderie among the group, what with it being that time of year where we remember the importance of Love and Friendship. Everyone makes an extra effort to look their best -- and indeed, who does not look their best in wintry clothing? And, of course, there is the food. Nothing says Christmas like a batch of freshly-baked cookies (my contribution to the evening's festivities, by the way).

Of course, I am always reminded of the spread at the Shipmans' house. We went every Christmas, for their annual to-do was the highlight of the year. Bob and Dolores lived in the same house forever. They had their kids in that house, they welcomed their grandchildren in that house, and I believe they also got to see some great-grandchildren in that house. Peggy lived with them, and a bear would be added to her collection every year (teddy, not grizzly). And do correct me if I am wrong, but did they not serve folded ham with a dish of mustard? It was delicious!

They eventually moved out of their Ft. Lauderdale home, an event that shook the world. No, truly. My father called it the death of Old Florida, the Florida you read about in the novels of John D. MacDonald, the Florida that inspired the Golden Girls to sing, "Miami, Miami/You've got style". They moved to central Florida, and Bob died when I was high school. The Saturday before Thanksgiving, Dolores joined him. And so ended an era. Oh sure, it had been years since we had done a to-do at their place, but this was the official end.

The latest tradition, for me anyway, is Roxanna's. It's a very intime affair, held every Christmas Eve. Just a few friends getting together and celebrating the most important holiday on the calendar. Funnily enough, I'm pretty sure I'm the only one without a drop of Jewish blood that attends the party. Because, as I've said before, Christmas ain't just for Christians, baby. Oh, and there's Lea's party, which I do not attend as often as I should, but which is always a worthy celebration.

Basically, Christmas parties rock. The holiday's all about Love. What better way to celebrate that than by ringing it in with your best mates and family? Hey, as long as the food's good, right? Well, that and mistletoe. OK, all that, plus if you get a really good dance going:



Frosted window panes
Candles gleaming inside
Painted cany canes on the the tree
Santa's on his way,
He's filled his slay
With things, things for you and for me

It's the time of year
When the world falls in love
Every song you hear
Seems to say
Merry Christmas
May your new year dreams come true
And this song of mine
In three quarter time
Wishes you and yours
The same thing too

Merry Christmas
May your new year dreams come true
And this song of mine
In three quarter time
Wishes you and yours
The same thing too
Merry Christmas to you

Stave Ten: In Which the Author Tells the Truth

DAY TEN OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

Life in the film school is busy, you know. This is my first day without any duties to perform, fortunately, and so I can return to my sadly neglected HHE.

We are finally finished with shooting our F3s. This is the third narrative we have completed at the film school, and once again I have achieved a dream. I have finally written a piece that's been in my head since I was ten. And, most importantly, I worked on a Christmas movie. Appropriate, right?

The film is Star of Wonder, a seven-minute short written and directed by my friend Evan, a filmmaker whom I greatly respect and admire. Film follows a brother and sister during the Christmas season, just six months after the death of their older brother. The sister begins openly questioning the existence of Santa and God and Heaven, and it hurts her brother. She has a talk with their mother, who tries to convince her that it's not always about what's true, but what is your truth. You understand? It ends in the woods as the siblings follow a star to the tree where their brother died, and the ending...my God, the ending is beautiful.

Thank Whatever I worked on this movie. I grew up in the church, but I have since decided that Jesus is not the son of God. I still have trouble, though, coping with what I do believe in. Sometimes I think I'm an atheist. Other times, I can acknowledge the existence of a Creator, for everything on Earth works so perfectly and purposefully that it seems absurd to consider it all spontaneous. I find the Bible to be full of contradictions and lapses in logic, to be more symbolic than anything else. Yet I take great offense to those that would call it meaningless or garbage, for much of what is written in there has some historical context. Besides: Song of Solomon, Proverbs, Ecclesiastes, Exodus, First and Second Kings, Judges -- that's some good shit. Sex and violence at every turn.

It is especially at this time of year when I think on these things. Christmas is my favorite holiday, yet the birth of Jesus means little to me spiritually. Of course, one can celebrate it as the birth of an influential historical figure, but I don't really celebrate the births of Mohammed and Moses, now do I? And it has its roots in the secular celebrations of the Winter Solstice, anyway, which I can totally get behind. (I love Winter. It's more cinematic.) At the same time, I hate it when the cynics use this fact as an attack on people who claim "Jesus is the Reason for the Season". I've gotten into many arguments on both sides. Yes, acknowledge the history of the holiday, for ignorance is stupid. But please respect that there are people who look forward to this annual date as a celebration of their faith.

A story:

Some friends and I were setting up a green screen. This was the week before Thanksgiving, and we eventually started discussing the holiday season. I declared my love of Christmas, with its hokey songs and tinsel and everything. One of my mates -- and I think he's great, don't get me wrong -- talked about its Pagan origins, and reasoned that what I thought of Christmas isn't true Christmas. It's meaningless. I scoffed and said, "I don't believe in Jesus, either. But I do believe in Peace on Earth and Good Will Toward Men. My Christmas is true for me."

That's what it's all about. And sure, you can reason that man is imperfect and incapable of Peace on Earth, so Jesus needed to be born in order to bring it forth. But I disagree. As Evan wrote in Star of Wonder, it's about whether or not there's some truth worth believing in. My truth is that we are all capable of good. We are all capable of love.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nlo1kldHjF8

I believe in Santa Claus
Like I believe in love
I believe in Santa Claus
And everything he does
There's no question in my mind
That he does exist
Just like love I know he's there
Waiting to be missed

I believe in Santa Claus
But there was a time
I thought I had grown to old
For such a childish rhyme
He became a dream to me
Till one Christmas night
Someone stood beside my bed
With a beard of white
"So you're too old for Santa Claus"?
He said with a smile
Then you're too old for all the things
That make a life worth while
For what is happiness but dreams
and do they all come true
Look at me and tell me, son
What is real to you?

Just believe in Santa Claus
Like you believe in love
Just believe in Santa Claus
And everything he does
Wipe that question from your mind
Yes, he does exist!

Just like love you knows he's there
Waiting to be missed
Just like love I know he's there
Waiting to be be missed

Stave Four: In Which We Meditate on Mistletoe

DAY FOUR OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

What's the one thing young, attractive people and older, extremely sad people do every year, without exception, at Christmas?

Try to desperately to get a kiss under the mistletoe.

But which is the desperate one?

It's the truth. You can try to chuckle and play it off like you know it's lame, but everyone wants a kiss under the mistletoe. For one thing, we can get some action without being creepy. I mean, hey, it's just a holiday tradition, nothing more. For another...well, no, I'm sure that's the main reason. And yeah, people try to be hokey about it. "Oh-ho, the mistletoe," people exclaim in odd voices, as though it's a tradition they're only honoring as a goof. But you like it. Admit it.

It seems odd, of course, that this tradition exists. Indeed, many times it seems as though the only thing keeping it alive is desperation and drunken Christmas parties. Think about it: what's so romantic about a plant whose berries would cause diarrhea if devoured? Some claim that its origins date back to Norse myhtology.

So there's this god Baldr, right? He's all about beauty and love and being happy and just, like, positive vibes, man. Ah, but Baldr and his mother, Frigga, keep having fucked up dreams about him dying, so Frigga forces all the objects of the world to never harm him. The only thing she does not force into this deal is Mistletoe, because it's too small and insignificant to do anything.

Loki learns this, and because he is the mischief-maker, he makes mischief out of this. He makes a spear out of mistletoe and gives it to Baldr's blind brother. The gods hurl stuff at Baldr for shits and gigs (don't we all have a friend like that?), and Baldr's blind brother throws the spear. It kills Baldr, Odin's son kills the blind one, Thor kicks a dwarf into the funeral pyre, and snake venom drips onto Loki's face after he is tethered to rocks.

Aw, crap.

Winter falls upon the all the lands, until the gods bring Baldr back to life. Frigga enchants the mistletoe, making it a sacred plant that would now bring love instead of death. They're opposites, you know. When we kiss under the mistletoe, it is a celebration of the resurrection of Baldr, a testament t mistletoe never harming another living soul, ever. Except, you know, for the diarrhea.

Today, it is best-known as the clue that tips off Selena Kyle and Bruce Wayne to each other's true identities in Batman Returns. For some reason, they like to recite an odd little rhyme about how "Mistletoe can be deadly, if you eat it/But a kiss can be even deadlier, if you mean it." Okay, so it doesn't really rhyme, but it feels like that's what they were going for. They make this discovery at the Christmas party held by department store owner Max Schreck, which is soon crashed by a vengeful Penguin. Christmas.

Oh, and here's something cool. Mistletoe can probe beneath tree bark so that it can suck up nutrients and water during a drought. Because of this, it is called...the vampire plant.

Not to be confused with the vampire fruit.

There's a very good reason
Why the holiday season
Is a wonderful time
For a boy and girl to fall in love

'Cause Santa and Cupid
Planned exactly what you did
When you kissed me by the mistletoe above

We stood there kissin' by the mistletoe
Tingle, tingle (tingle, tingle)
Mmm and away we go
Jingle, jingle
Kissin' by the mistletoe, love came to stay
And now it's Christmas every day

There's a heavenly treasure
More than money can measure
In the gift you get when you give your love
And I can tell
(kiss, kiss, kiss, kiss)

'Cause whenever it's Christmas
If I never get this much
He ran my heart I remember very well

We stood there kissin' by the mistletoe
Tingle, tingle (tingle, tingle)
Mmm and away we go
Jingle, jingle
Kissin' by the mistletoe, love came to stay
And now it's Christmas every day

I said now it's Christmas every day
Oh yeah
And now it's Christmas every day

Stave Two: In Which a Favorite Film is Discussed

DAY TWO OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

We made merry last night as my roommate and I hosted a large, impromptu party to honor one of the greatest Christmas movies I have ever seen: Love Actually.

I find Love Actually to be such a curious piece. It's schmaltzy, overly sentimental, cliche-ridden...and yet delightful, funny, touching. The DVD cover dubs it "The Ultimate Romantic-Comedy." I dare not disagree. The movie has everything I could ask for: an ensemble cast, a British setting, Christmas and musical numbers.

I've felt a kinship with this movie since I first saw it on HBO in November of 2004. We had just returned from a Thanksgiving in Ponte Vedra, Florida. I had just enough time to walk in, unpack, and turn on my TV. I knew Love Actually was coming on from all the promos, and ever since I Ms. Bohuney recommended it in Spanish III, this movie intrigued me. Besides...Alan Rickman. Anyway, I watched it that night. Then I watched the encore. Then I saw it again a week later. And when I got it for Christmas from Aunt Karin, you can bet I was the happiest little boy on God's green Earth.

Love Actually gets extra props for actually being about Christmas. The storyline between Alan Rickman and Heike Makatsch could only work on Christmas -- the only other option is Valentine's Day, and you can't be blind to that kind of behavior on Valentine's Day. Bill Nighy's storyline acknowledges how crass and commercial the season is, only to show a cynic touched by the True Spirit. They fucking singing "All I Want for Christmas is You"!

Besides, to quote the movie, "Christmas is a time to be with people you love." Eff yeah.

And yes, you know what song is going up. I do it every year, and this is most appropriate.



I feel it in my fingers,
I feel it in my toes,
Christmas is all around me,
and so the feeling grows

It's written in the wind,
It's everywhere I go,
So if you really love Christmas,
C'mon and let it snow?

You know I love Christmas
I always will
My mind's made up
The way that I feel
There's no beginning
There'll be no end
Cuz on Christmas,
You can depend

You gave your presents to me
And I gave mine to you
I need Santa beside me
In everything I do

You know I love Christmas
I always will
My mind's made up
The way that I feel
There's no beginning
There'll be no end
Cuz on Christmas,
You can depend

Cuz on Christmas,
You can depend

It's written on the wind
It's everywhere I go
So if you really love me
C'mon and let it snow?
C'mon and let it snow?
So if you really love
C'mon and let it
If you really love me
C'mon and let it
Now if you really love me
C'mon and let it snow?

Stave 1: In Which the Silver Screener Welcomes in the Holiday Season

DAY ONE OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA

It's finally arrived! Another month of reindeer, carols, Santa, turkey, Hallmark movies and visions of sugarplums dancing in your head. A waltz, perhaps? A cha-cha? That's for your own psyche to determine. Meanwhile, we've got bigger fish to fry.

The first HHE post is always an awkward one. Do I provide a holiday fact? Make an observation about society? Try to connect Woody Allen's 74th birthday to some aspect of the holiday season? Usually, I hope I can just tread water or come up with a plan for the whole month.

What I'm going to try to do is this: (a) delve into as much Wikipedia as I can to provide new and interesting holiday trivia, (b) review a number of holiday films, and (c) teach new holiday songs. The usual usual.

So, although today there may be nothing, tonight I am going to be watching a Christmas movie. Expect a review tomorrow as I discuss what the movie means to me, to Christmas, and my general opinion of it.

I apologize for the shrug that is this first post. Rest assured, my friends and fans, that the next twenty-five days are going to be awesome. And to prove it, I'm going to entice you with a song from The Waitresses. You may remember their hit song "I Know What Boys Like," most recently used in trailers for the fantastic Jennifer's Body. Well, it turns out they recorded a hit holiday tune, "Christmas Wrapping", released in 1981. The song is popular enough to have been covered by The Donnas (for Shrek the Halls), Miranda Cosgrove (for Drake and Josh) and the Spice Girls (for shits and gigs). Honestly: it's a pretty B.A. song:



"Bah, humbug!" No, that's too strong
'Cause it is my favorite holiday
But all this year's been a busy blur
Don't think I have the energy

To add to my already mad rush
Just 'cause it's 'tis the season.
The perfect gift for me would be
Completions and connections left from

Last year, ski shop,
Encounter, most interesting.
Had his number but never the time
Most of '81 passed along those lines.

So deck those halls, trim those trees
Raise up cups of Christmas cheer,
I just need to catch my breath,
Christmas by myself this year.

Calendar picture, frozen landscape,
Chilled this room for twenty-four days,
Evergreens, sparkling snow
Get this winter over with!

Flashback to springtime, saw him again,
Would've been good to go for lunch,
Couldn't agree when we were both free,
We tried, we said we'd keep in touch.

Didn't, of course, 'til summertime,
Out to the beach to his boat could I join him?
No, this time it was me,
Sunburn in the third degree.

Now the calendar's just one page
And, of course, I am excited
Tonight's the night, but I've set my mind
Not to do too much about it.

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
But I think I'll miss this one this year.
Hardly dashing through the snow
Cause I bundled up too tight
Last minute have-to-do's
A few cards a few calls
'Cause it's r-s-v-p
No thanks, no party lights
It's Christmas Eve, gonna relax
Turned down all of my invites.

Last fall I had a night to myself,
Same guy called, halloween party,
Waited all night for him to show,
This time his car wouldn't go,

Forget it, it's cold, it's getting late,
Trudge on home to celebrate
In a quiet way, unwind
Doing Christmas right this time.

A&P has provided me
With the world's smallest turkey
Already in the oven, nice and hot
Oh damn! Guess what I forgot?

So on with the boots, back out in the snow
To the only all-night grocery,
When what to my wondering eyes should appear
In the line is that guy I've been chasing all year!

"I'm spending this one alone," he said.
"Need a break; this year's been crazy."
I said, "Me too, but why are you?
You mean you forgot cranberries too?"

Then suddenly we laughed and laughed
Caught on to what was happening
That Christmas magic's brought this tale
To a very happy ending! "

Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn't miss this one this year!
Merry Christmas! Merry Christmas!
Couldn't miss this one this year!

Christmas Eve

DAY TWENTY-FOUR OF HOLLMANN HOLIDAY EXTRAVAGANZA!

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house

Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse;

The stockings were hung by the chimney with care,

In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there;

The children were nestled all snug in their beds,

While visions of sugar-plums danced in their heads;

And mamma in her 'kerchief, and I in my cap,

Had just settled down for a long winter's nap,

When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,

I sprang from the bed to see what was the matter.

Away to the window I flew like a flash,

Tore open the shutters and threw up the sash.

The moon on the breast of the new-fallen snow

Gave the lustre of mid-day to objects below,

When, what to my wondering eyes should appear,

But a miniature sleigh, and eight tiny reindeer,

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,

I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.

More rapid than eagles his coursers they came,

And he whistled, and shouted, and called them by name;

"Now, Dasher! now, Dancer! now, Prancer and Vixen!

On, Comet! on Cupid! on, Donder and Blitzen!

To the top of the porch! to the top of the wall!

Now dash away! dash away! dash away all!"

As dry leaves that before the wild hurricane fly,

When they meet with an obstacle, mount to the sky,

So up to the house-top the coursers they flew,

With the sleigh full of toys, and St. Nicholas too.

And then, in a twinkling, I heard on the roof

The prancing and pawing of each little hoof.

As I drew in my hand, and was turning around,

Down the chimney St. Nicholas came with a bound.

He was dressed all in fur, from his head to his foot,

And his clothes were all tarnished with ashes and soot;

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,

And he looked like a peddler just opening his pack.

His eyes -- how they twinkled! his dimples how merry!

His cheeks were like roses, his nose like a cherry!

His droll little mouth was drawn up like a bow,

And the beard of his chin was as white as the snow;

The stump of a pipe he held tight in his teeth,

And the smoke it encircled his head like a wreath;

He had a broad face and a little round belly,

That shook, when he laughed like a bowlful of jelly.

He was chubby and plump, a right jolly old elf,

And I laughed when I saw him, in spite of myself;

A wink of his eye and a twist of his head,

Soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;

He spoke not a word, but went straight to his work,

And filled all the stockings; then turned with a jerk,

And laying his finger aside of his nose,

And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle.

But I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight,

"Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good-night!"