Monday, February 1, 2010

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The Hollmann Award Nominees!!!


"Well, well, well. Greetings to all. Within this beard is the full press release regarding the nominees for the Fourth Annual Hollmann Awards. And maybe a statue or two. I'm not telling. I'm William Hurt; I understand if you don't recognize me. You may remember me as the Oscar Winning Actor from Kiss of the Spider Woman. Or from the modern classic Mr. Brooks. You know, which ever one floats your boat the most.

"What did I just say, though? That I was here to divulge the nominees for the Fourth Annual Hollmann Awards. And I know you're dying of anticipation. We'll begin with the technical nominations, including the brand new category of Best Ensemble. In fact, let's start there:

BEST ENSEMBLE
Justine Baddeley & Kim Davis, Whip It!
Ellen Chenoweth & Rachel Tenner, A Serious Man
Sarah Crowe & Meredith Tucker, In the Loop
Celestia Fox, Easy Virtue
TBA, Inglourious Basterds

BEST SOUND
Antichrist
Drag Me to Hell

Inglourious Basterds
A Serious Man
Star Trek

BEST VISUAL EFFECTS
2012
Avatar
District 9
Watchmen
Where the Wild Things Are

BEST PRODUCTION DESIGN
Coraline
Fantastic Mr. Fox
Moon
Public Enemies
A Single Man

BEST HAIR/MAKEUP
Antichrist
District 9
Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus
Star Trek

BEST COSTUME DESIGN
Colleen Atwood, Public Enemies
Hope Hanafin, (500) Days of Summer
Janet Patterson, Bright Star
Anna B. Sheppard, Inglourious Basterds
Charlotte Walter, Easy Virtue

BEST EDITING
Alan Edward Bell, (500) Days of Summer
James Cameron, John Refoua & Stephen Rifkin, Avatar
Alexander Hall, The Messenger
Roderick Jaynes, A Serious Man
Sally Menke, Inglourious Basterds

BEST ORIGINAL SONG
"Back to Tennessee" from Hannah Montana: The Movie
"Dig a Little Deeper" from The Princess and the Frog
"Never Knew I Needed" from The Princess and the Frog
"Possibility" from The Twilight Saga: New Moon
"Through the Trees" from Jennifer's Body

BEST ORIGINAL SCORE
Alexandre Desplat, Fantastic Mr. Fox
Alexandre Desplat, Julie & Julia
Alexandre Desplat, The Twilight Saga: New Moon
Elliot Goldenthal, Public Enemies
Abel Korzeniowski, A Single Man

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
Dion Beebe, Nine
Greig Fraser, Bright Star
Eduard Grau, A Single Man
Anthony Dod Mantle, Antichrist
Robert Richardson, Inglourious Basterds

"Great fun, isn't it? And now, to present the Sexy Eight -- that is, the awards that journalists give most coverage to despite the group effort that is filmmaking -- is the Face of the Hollmann Awards, Philip Baker Hall!"


"Well, it was only a matter of time before they got me back. I guess they like to bring me back to announce the Sexy Eight because...well, look at me. Not everyone my age has a body this rockin'. So, you know, correlations. I could babble on and on without ever amusing you, of course, but time is short, so is life, and we might as well do this:

BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY
Wes Anderson & Noah Baumbach, Fantastic Mr. Fox
Dave Eggers & Spike Jonze, Where the Wild Things Are
Nora Ephron, Julie & Julia
Geoffrey Fletcher, Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire
Jason Reitman & Sheldon Turner, Up in the Air

BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
James Cameron, Avatar
Jane Campion, Bright Star
Ethan Coen & Joel Coen, A Serious Man
Scott Neustatder & Michael H. Weber, (500) Days of Summer
Quentin Tarantino, Inglourious Basterds

BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR
Peter Capaldi, In the Loop
Colin Firth, Easy Virtue
Woody Harrelson, The Messenger
Fred Melamed, A Serious Man
Stanley Tucci, Julie & Julia

BEST ACTOR
Johnny Depp, Public Enemies
Colin Firth, A Single Man
Ben Foster, The Messenger
Joseph Gordon-Levitt, (500) Days of Summer
Sam Rockwell, Moon

BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS
Marion Cotillard, Public Enemies
Mo'Nique, Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire
Julianne Moore, A Single Man
Samantha Morton, The Messenger
Kristin Scott Thomas, Easy Virtue

BEST ACTRESS
Abbie Cornish, Bright Star
Carey Mulligan, An Education
Zoe Saldana, Avatar
Gabourey Sidibe, Precious: Based on the Novel 'Push' by Sapphire
Meryl Streep, Julie & Julia

BEST DIRECTOR
James Cameron, Avatar
Jane Campion, Bright Star
Michael Mann, Public Enemies
Oren Moverman, The Messenger
Marc Webb, (500) Days of Summer

"And finally....

"The nominees for BEST PICTURE are:
(500) Days of Summer, produced by Mason Novick/Jessica Tuchinsky/Mark Waters/Steven J. Wolfe
Avatar, produced by James Cameron/Jon Landau
Fantastic Mr. Fox, produced by Allison Abbate/Wes Anderson/Jeremy Dawson/Scott Rudin
The Messenger, produced by Mark Gordon/Lawrence Inglee/Zach Miller
Public Enemies, Michael Mann/Kevin Misher

[UPDATED: Producers nominated for Best Picture, as of 1/13/2017]

"A doozy of a show, folks, a doozy of a show. Many, many films were considered, but only thirty-two made the final cut. Some fast facts for ya:

"Public Enemies leads with seven nominations.

"Fantastic Mr. Fox has the least number of nominations for a Best Picture candidate with only four.

"Bright Star and Inglourious Basterds tie for the most nominations without a Best Picture nod: six.

"An Education and Up in the Air are tied for the least nominated members of the Sexy Eight: one apiece.

"But that's enough of that. Let us now get a look at our hosts. That's right: plural. Philip Glass got one vote, Alan Alda got one, Judi Dench alone got one, Nigel made mention of Marcia Gay Harden's fierceness...can we count that for her? But with four votes, the duo are the clear winners. Ladies and germs: JUDI DENCH AND MAGGIE SMITH!!!"

*Cue music: There is Nothin' Like a Dame*



Well, our films may have only gotten one nom each, but at least we run the show, eh, Mogs?

If he thinks I'm doing it without a steady supply of champagne or, you know, bourbon, he's bonkers.

4 comments:

Amanda said...

Oh hallelujah, at least SOMEONE is loving on Zoe Saldana. And Fox :)

Andrew: Encore Entertainment said...

Surprised at the lack of [tech] nods for Nine. Would you think me crazy if I say that supporting actress is looking so good for me this year that Mo'Nique could be knocked out of my five?

Walter L. Hollmann said...

Amanda: Natch. :)

Andrew: Nine had the unfortunate habit of being sixth place in almost everything. I really do wish it had a stronger presence here, but in the end, I had to be honest with myself. I still like the movie a lot, but it was NOT the supporting actress gumbo I wanted. As for leaving Mo'Nique off your ballot...you're a madman! ;)

Danny King said...

Great to see the love for Public Enemies. I actually thought the script was rather poor, but Depp, Cotillard, and Goldenthal's score are all remarkable, and they make the film worth-watching.