Murder on the Orient Express (2017)
dir: Kenneth Branagh
Showing posts with label Penelope Cruz. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Penelope Cruz. Show all posts
Friday, November 10, 2017
It Came True: Murder on the Orient Express, 2017
The day has finally come! I have seen a brand new Agatha Christie movie in the theater! Did it do the Queen of Crime justice? How did it compare to the many other versions we've watched and discussed? Was it any good? My dears, it's the exciting conclusion of Murder on the Orient Express week!
Saturday, June 26, 2010
You're lovely, absolutely lovely...
Two years ago, when I had a Livejournal, I submitted a list of Ten Celebrity Crushes of the moment. It was one of those memes going around, and everyone else focused on the menfolks, so I thought I had to contribute a little something something. Well, two years is a long time, with new fixations and surprise crushes springing up. So while it used to look like this:
1. Drew Barrymore
2. Meryl Streep
3. Jenna Fischer
4. Maggie Gyllenhaal
5. Miley Cyrus
6. Joan Allen
7. Julianne Moore
8. Laura Linney
9. Helen Mirren
10. Allison Janney
...it may have changed substantially. For instance, it's been a while since I've loved Janney or Mirren in something, though I always look forward to their work. I mean, all these ladies will always be adored by me, but what Hollywood beauties have been haunting my dreams lately? Take a look:
1. Drew Barrymore
2. Meryl Streep
3. Jenna Fischer
4. Maggie Gyllenhaal
5. Miley Cyrus
6. Joan Allen
7. Julianne Moore
8. Laura Linney
9. Helen Mirren
10. Allison Janney
...it may have changed substantially. For instance, it's been a while since I've loved Janney or Mirren in something, though I always look forward to their work. I mean, all these ladies will always be adored by me, but what Hollywood beauties have been haunting my dreams lately? Take a look:
10. Nancy Olson
Academy Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (Sunset Blvd)
Purely because of Sunset Blvd. I don't think I've seen her in anything else, actually. But listening to ALW's "Too Much in Love to Care" and picturing Miss Olson singing it should be enough to do anybody in.
9. Kristen Stewart
Oh, I did not expect this, either. Then The Runaways came out and showed me that, hey, this girl can actually act! She's always kind of fallen into the trap of using her tics, but when she has a director willing to get a real performance out of her (Into the Wild), she's fantastic. And adorable. And I am totally going to the midnight of Eclipse.
8. Penelope Cruz
Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (Vicky Cristina Barcelona)
Academy Award Winner for Best Supporting Actress (Vicky Cristina Barcelona) and Nominee for Best Actress (Volver) and Best Supporting Actress (Nine)
When I first saw her in Gothika, I thought to myself, "Wow, why does everyone hate her? She's easily the best thing about this movie." For yes, there was a time when no one liked Penelope Cruz and thought her talentless. With an Oscar win and two additional nominations under her belt, she's hushed her critics. She's got a body that won't quit and an unusual beauty that is instantly bewitching.
7. Laura Linney
Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (The Nanny Diaries)
Academy Award Nominee for Best Actress (You Can Count On Me, The Savages) and Best Supporting Actress (Kinsey)
Can you believe she used to be one my least favorite actresses? Oh, the folly of youth! I don't get Showtime, so I'll have to find some other way to catch The Big C. When the hell is she going to win an Oscar? Or even a Tony? Anyway, she's a sophisticated kind of pretty, a high-class beauty, and clearly a smart woman. I like brains. Maybe not like zombies do, but I like them nonetheless.
6. Maggie Gyllenhaal
Academy Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (Crazy Heart)
Sad though it may be that her least performance got her an Oscar nod, I still love Maggie. She seems like a feisty gal, one comfortable with her sexuality, yet equally comfortable in a Barnes & Noble cafe, know what I mean? That voice, too. That voice...
5. Julianne Moore
Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Supporting Actress (A Single Man)
Academy Award Nominee for Best Actress (The End of the Affair, Far From Heaven) and Best Supporting Actress (Boogie Nights, The Hours)
Boy, she's moved up a bit, hasn't she? Is it her performance in A Single Man? The anticipation of The Kids Are All Right? Certain sequences in Chloe? She only grows more beautiful with each passing year.
4. Jessica Biel
Now here's a face that could launch a thousand ships. She shows up on-screen with the kind of gumption that reminds me of early Ashley Judd. And she can sing: not only does she show off her chanteuse skills in Easy Virtue, but she may be appearing on Broadway in a musical version of Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown, alongside Patti Lupone! Her additional assets also make her the living embodiment of Jessica Rabbit.
3. Glenn Close
Academy Award Nominee for Best Actress (Fatal Attraction, Dangerous Liaisons) and Best Supporting Actress (The World According to Garp, The Big Chill, The Natural)
I blame Damages. An attractive older woman with confidence, intelligence and independence? Sexy. Her eyes bedazzle and her singing haunts. That she's become, at 63, the go-to gal for ball-busters on TV is awesome. Like Linney, she just emits this aura of Class, doesn't she?
2. Meryl Streep
Hollmann Award Winner for Best Supporting Actress (A Prairie Home Companion) and Nominee for Best Actress (Julie & Julia)
Academy Award Winner for Best Actress (Sophie's Choice) and Best Supporting Actress (Kramer vs. Kramer) and Nominee for Best Actress (The French Lieutenant's Woman, Silkwood, Out of Africa, Ironweed, A Cry in the Dark, Postcards from the Edge, The Bridges of Madison County, One True Thing, Music of the Heart, The Devil Wears Prada, Doubt, Julie & Julia) and Best Supporting Actress (The Deer Hunter, Adaptation)
Naturally, the Top Two are unchanged. Meryl will always be beautiful, always be talented, always give good interview. She's simply the best. Actress, that is.
1. Drew Barrymore
Remember the time everyone finally listened to me and recognized Drew Barrymore for her acting ability? That was a great couple of weeks. So much to admire about her: her bubbly demeanor, her openness to trying new things, her work ethic, the fact that she bounced back from a problematic childhood. A beautiful woman, inside and out, Drew will always be Number One.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Crazy Hearts in the Air for Precious Performances! Nine!
It is with great honor that I direct you to this Sunday's edition of StinkyLulu's Supporting Actress Smackdown. Looking at this year's batch of Oscar nominees, the result is kind of...inevitable. You'll see it on there, of course, but for me, it was no contest. Thanks, of course, to StinkyLulu for once again graciously inviting me to take part in this most exciting of Smackdowns.
I wanted to see how my ratings for now compared to my initial reactions.
My lowest score, one heart, went to Maggie Gyllenhaal. As I wrote:
Maggie Gyllenhaal is fine, playing a vulnerable young woman who always seems to be attracted to the wrong guy. She does not want to love Bridges, but she falls for him, and takes the risk. Sometimes, though, she looks like she wishes she could do more. It doesn't help that the editing, or maybe the screenplay itself, seems to cut most developments, including what attracts her to Bad Blake.
Two hearts to Anna Kendrick, whose nomination still flummoxes me. When I first saw her movie:
Kendrick has certain moments where she shines, reminding me why I like her in Rocket Science and tolerate her in the Twilight movies. But her Natalie Keener is shrill, whiny, and cliched. Some of her dialogue, God help me, sounds like lines written for the middle daughter in Dan in Real Life. As for that breakdown scene midway through the film? Yikes. Talk about overplaying the comedy. She is the least consistent out of all the actors, and there seems to be no throughline for her character. It's all moments. While I didn't hate her, and while I definitely (DEFINITELY) still love the movie, Kendrick's Natalie gets a shake of the head from me.
Penelope Cruz, upon reflection, got three hearts. As I said in my review of her film:
Penelope Cruz is, naturally, sexy and funny, and also surprisingly vulnerable as the mistress. "Call from the Vatican" is a hot number as it is, but Cruz just sizzles. Bring the vapors.
I gave four hearts to Vera Farmiga. My initial reaction:
Vera Farmiga is smart, sexy and confident as Alex, who describes herself to Ryan Bingham as "you, but with a vagina." You love her. You must. I certainly fell for her, and so of course I'm rooting for the coupling all throughout. There are sweet moments between her and Clooney that are charmingly understated. Farmiga gives one of the most relatable, believable performances of the year.
Of course, in lock-step with the Globes, Critics and SAG, my five hearts were awarded to Mo'Nique:
Mo'Nique is her mother Mary. Ho. Ly. Crap.... Mo'Nique...is the mom from Hell. I had chills. Her first monologue, raw and abusive, dropped my jaw. Her final monologue gave me goosebumps. Mark these two on your ballots, people; they're in.
I think my opinion of Gyllenhaal lowers the more I reflect on the movie, whereas after a second viewing, Mo'Nique just gets better and better. Please also note: this is the first time I've ran th whole gamut of hearts. An interesting year, this.
But why read all that when you can just see what the Smackdowners have to say?
I wanted to see how my ratings for now compared to my initial reactions.
My lowest score, one heart, went to Maggie Gyllenhaal. As I wrote:
Maggie Gyllenhaal is fine, playing a vulnerable young woman who always seems to be attracted to the wrong guy. She does not want to love Bridges, but she falls for him, and takes the risk. Sometimes, though, she looks like she wishes she could do more. It doesn't help that the editing, or maybe the screenplay itself, seems to cut most developments, including what attracts her to Bad Blake.
Two hearts to Anna Kendrick, whose nomination still flummoxes me. When I first saw her movie:
Kendrick has certain moments where she shines, reminding me why I like her in Rocket Science and tolerate her in the Twilight movies. But her Natalie Keener is shrill, whiny, and cliched. Some of her dialogue, God help me, sounds like lines written for the middle daughter in Dan in Real Life. As for that breakdown scene midway through the film? Yikes. Talk about overplaying the comedy. She is the least consistent out of all the actors, and there seems to be no throughline for her character. It's all moments. While I didn't hate her, and while I definitely (DEFINITELY) still love the movie, Kendrick's Natalie gets a shake of the head from me.
Penelope Cruz, upon reflection, got three hearts. As I said in my review of her film:
Penelope Cruz is, naturally, sexy and funny, and also surprisingly vulnerable as the mistress. "Call from the Vatican" is a hot number as it is, but Cruz just sizzles. Bring the vapors.
I gave four hearts to Vera Farmiga. My initial reaction:
Vera Farmiga is smart, sexy and confident as Alex, who describes herself to Ryan Bingham as "you, but with a vagina." You love her. You must. I certainly fell for her, and so of course I'm rooting for the coupling all throughout. There are sweet moments between her and Clooney that are charmingly understated. Farmiga gives one of the most relatable, believable performances of the year.
Of course, in lock-step with the Globes, Critics and SAG, my five hearts were awarded to Mo'Nique:
Mo'Nique is her mother Mary. Ho. Ly. Crap.... Mo'Nique...is the mom from Hell. I had chills. Her first monologue, raw and abusive, dropped my jaw. Her final monologue gave me goosebumps. Mark these two on your ballots, people; they're in.
I think my opinion of Gyllenhaal lowers the more I reflect on the movie, whereas after a second viewing, Mo'Nique just gets better and better. Please also note: this is the first time I've ran th whole gamut of hearts. An interesting year, this.
But why read all that when you can just see what the Smackdowners have to say?
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
European Women Wearing Great Outfits
COCO BEFORE CHANEL
I seem to be very fortunate this week, in that I am finding one spectacular film after another. Coco Before Chanel is not flashy. It is not a "highlights reel" like other biopics. The title says it all, following Gabrielle "Coco" Chanel in the years prior to her making a name for herself in the fashion world. She sings, she sews, she dismisses the idea of love, she gains two lovers, c'est la vie.
Audrey Tautou's lead performance is deeply magnetic; you understand her strength, and you cannot help but be drawn to her. Benoit Poelvoorde plays her wealthy lover Etienne, a boorish man with old-fashioned ideas who both loves Coco and does not understand her. Alessandro Nivola is a sexy "Boy" Capel, Coco's British lover. Emmanuelle Devos is delightful and frustrating as an actress who still clings to the corsets and flowery chapeaux of the era, yet finds herself intrigued by Coco's more comfortable designs. The costumes are, as expected, exquisite. Alexandre Desplat's score is the perfect capper to an unbelievably great year for the composer.
Stripped of the biopic conventions, Coco Before Chanel becomes a period romance about a poor orphan girl and the rich men who love her. And that's not to suggest that co-writer/director Anne Fontaine and co-writer Camille Fontaine (are they related?) over-romanticized or insignificantized Coco's story. If, like me, you are a fan of Howards End or A Room with a View, than Coco Before Chanel should sit quite nicely with you.
THE YOUNG VICTORIA
The Young Victoria is by no means perfect. It's fifteen minutes short of being two hours, and you can feel it. The conflict involving the effect her friendship with Lord Melbourne is never explored deeply enough for the audience to get a real sense of it. The politics of the era are explained constantly and vaguely, so that you kind of understand the issues without really knowing what's going on. It ends too quickly, and there's a scene near the end in which Victoria flies into a justifiable rage at Albert, then goes off into a strange ego trip that undercuts the good point she was making. So Albert never has to apologize, but Victoria does. It's very strange.
That said, the film boasts fine performances from all its actors. Emily Blunt is a surprisingly warm Victoria, headstrong yet without confidence in her abilities. Rupert Friend continues to prove himself the greatest find of the season -- his Albert is adorable, smitten with the Queen, seeing her as his equal, comfortable with his role of house-husband. The chemistry between them had me completely. The gazebo scene, the proposal scene, the final scene: wonderful. When the film focuses on the two of them, we get one of the best movies of the year. Though Paul Bettany and Miranda Richardson are always wonderful to watch, and I was thrilled to see Mark Strong and Rachael Stirling yet again. Also, the costumes are beautiful, and Jean-Marc Vallee has a strange yet effective eye behind the camera.
I had some reservations about the film, sure. It's great, it just needs some room to breathe. The end is too rushed; a little over two hours would have been a suitable running time. It might have even given us more Victoria and Albert, and that is always a delight.
BROKEN EMBRACES
Penelope Cruz is beautiful and typically incredible. The cinematography, costumes and production design are beautiful. But good Lord this movie is long. It drags on and on and on. The movie cuts between 1994 and 2008, as a blind writer/director recalls his affair with Penelope Cruz. Well fuck 2008. The movie is way more interesting in 1994, and the 2008 scenes add little to the story...besides de-mystifying some of the more intriguing elements of the piece. There's a huge chunk of magnificence, but the last half-hour just kills it for me. Ultimately: a disappointment.
I seem to be very fortunate this week, in that I am finding one spectacular film after another. Coco Before Chanel is not flashy. It is not a "highlights reel" like other biopics. The title says it all, following Gabrielle "Coco" Chanel in the years prior to her making a name for herself in the fashion world. She sings, she sews, she dismisses the idea of love, she gains two lovers, c'est la vie.
Audrey Tautou's lead performance is deeply magnetic; you understand her strength, and you cannot help but be drawn to her. Benoit Poelvoorde plays her wealthy lover Etienne, a boorish man with old-fashioned ideas who both loves Coco and does not understand her. Alessandro Nivola is a sexy "Boy" Capel, Coco's British lover. Emmanuelle Devos is delightful and frustrating as an actress who still clings to the corsets and flowery chapeaux of the era, yet finds herself intrigued by Coco's more comfortable designs. The costumes are, as expected, exquisite. Alexandre Desplat's score is the perfect capper to an unbelievably great year for the composer.
Stripped of the biopic conventions, Coco Before Chanel becomes a period romance about a poor orphan girl and the rich men who love her. And that's not to suggest that co-writer/director Anne Fontaine and co-writer Camille Fontaine (are they related?) over-romanticized or insignificantized Coco's story. If, like me, you are a fan of Howards End or A Room with a View, than Coco Before Chanel should sit quite nicely with you.
THE YOUNG VICTORIA
The Young Victoria is by no means perfect. It's fifteen minutes short of being two hours, and you can feel it. The conflict involving the effect her friendship with Lord Melbourne is never explored deeply enough for the audience to get a real sense of it. The politics of the era are explained constantly and vaguely, so that you kind of understand the issues without really knowing what's going on. It ends too quickly, and there's a scene near the end in which Victoria flies into a justifiable rage at Albert, then goes off into a strange ego trip that undercuts the good point she was making. So Albert never has to apologize, but Victoria does. It's very strange.
That said, the film boasts fine performances from all its actors. Emily Blunt is a surprisingly warm Victoria, headstrong yet without confidence in her abilities. Rupert Friend continues to prove himself the greatest find of the season -- his Albert is adorable, smitten with the Queen, seeing her as his equal, comfortable with his role of house-husband. The chemistry between them had me completely. The gazebo scene, the proposal scene, the final scene: wonderful. When the film focuses on the two of them, we get one of the best movies of the year. Though Paul Bettany and Miranda Richardson are always wonderful to watch, and I was thrilled to see Mark Strong and Rachael Stirling yet again. Also, the costumes are beautiful, and Jean-Marc Vallee has a strange yet effective eye behind the camera.
I had some reservations about the film, sure. It's great, it just needs some room to breathe. The end is too rushed; a little over two hours would have been a suitable running time. It might have even given us more Victoria and Albert, and that is always a delight.
BROKEN EMBRACES
Penelope Cruz is beautiful and typically incredible. The cinematography, costumes and production design are beautiful. But good Lord this movie is long. It drags on and on and on. The movie cuts between 1994 and 2008, as a blind writer/director recalls his affair with Penelope Cruz. Well fuck 2008. The movie is way more interesting in 1994, and the 2008 scenes add little to the story...besides de-mystifying some of the more intriguing elements of the piece. There's a huge chunk of magnificence, but the last half-hour just kills it for me. Ultimately: a disappointment.
Thursday, May 14, 2009
Speaking of Trailers....
This morning, my attention was directed to this lovely bit o' crumpet:
Holy holy holy! That's Fergie singing throughout, by the way. And sexy, sexy Penelope Cruz is sexy. And sexy, sexy Judi Dench is...well, anyway, it looks amazing! I see Rob Marshall is once again going for an actual "stage" for his musical numbers. But I guess it works, as most of the numbers in Nine are either soliloquies or fantasies.
Holy holy holy! That's Fergie singing throughout, by the way. And sexy, sexy Penelope Cruz is sexy. And sexy, sexy Judi Dench is...well, anyway, it looks amazing! I see Rob Marshall is once again going for an actual "stage" for his musical numbers. But I guess it works, as most of the numbers in Nine are either soliloquies or fantasies.
Sunday, February 22, 2009
OSCARS
I lost my Oscar pool by just one point. If I had predicted Sean Penn instead of Mickey Rourke, it would have been a three-way tie between my roommate, a guest, and myself. Unfortunately, I went with my heart, which what did it for me on Supporting Actress, too (Amy Adams over Penelope Cruz...I knew better).
Still, what a great show. Hugh Jackman, I think, was one of the better hosts we've seen, high above Ellen, Chris Rock, and last year's Jon Stewart. I thought the whole idea of pre-production, production, and post was stellar. Putting Director before Actress and Actor was a ballsy move, but pretty cool. It broke the formula, made me interested.
Kate finally got an Oscar, so all is well with the world. Penelope Cruz is now an Oscar-winner, and in a Woody Allen movie no less -- the first time since Mira Sorvino won in 1994. Which might not bode well for Ms. Cruz, now that I think about it, but at least she'll always have it. And now she and Javier can have twin statuettes in their bedroom.
The idea of the Joker being an Oscar-winning role is one for the ages. The fact that Heath Ledger, star of A Knight's Tale, is an Oscar-winning actor, is inspiring. Wowsers.
I just don't get the Foreign Language category. Not that I'm mad or anything, I haven't seen any of the films nominated. But I just don't get it. Don't, like, the majority of them only get a release after the Oscars? It's...so confusing.
Slumdog won everything it was nominated for, except for Sound Editing, which went to The Dark Knight. And let me tell you, watching it right now on a big screen HD, on Blu-ray? It fucking rocks.
Still, what a great show. Hugh Jackman, I think, was one of the better hosts we've seen, high above Ellen, Chris Rock, and last year's Jon Stewart. I thought the whole idea of pre-production, production, and post was stellar. Putting Director before Actress and Actor was a ballsy move, but pretty cool. It broke the formula, made me interested.
Kate finally got an Oscar, so all is well with the world. Penelope Cruz is now an Oscar-winner, and in a Woody Allen movie no less -- the first time since Mira Sorvino won in 1994. Which might not bode well for Ms. Cruz, now that I think about it, but at least she'll always have it. And now she and Javier can have twin statuettes in their bedroom.
The idea of the Joker being an Oscar-winning role is one for the ages. The fact that Heath Ledger, star of A Knight's Tale, is an Oscar-winning actor, is inspiring. Wowsers.
I just don't get the Foreign Language category. Not that I'm mad or anything, I haven't seen any of the films nominated. But I just don't get it. Don't, like, the majority of them only get a release after the Oscars? It's...so confusing.
Slumdog won everything it was nominated for, except for Sound Editing, which went to The Dark Knight. And let me tell you, watching it right now on a big screen HD, on Blu-ray? It fucking rocks.
Sunday, February 8, 2009
Award Weekend
The WGA and BAFTA gave out their awards this weekend. I am sorry to report that there were very few surprising results. What surprises were in store, though, were quite rewarding.
WGA
ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: Simon Beaufoy, Slumdog Millionaire (based upon the novel Q&A by Vikas Swarup)
Beat out Eric Roth's Benjamin Button, Peter Morgan's Frost/Nixon, John Patrick Shanley's Doubt, and The Nolans' The Dark Knight. Of course, it's the only nominated screenplay I haven't read. I haven't read the novel either, and that's also the one exception here. I need to read the damn script already. 'Twould be nice to know what the fuss is about.
ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Dustin Lance Black, Milk
Beat out Woody Allen's Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Robert Siegel's The Wrestler, Thomas McCarthy's The Visitor, The Coens' Burn After Reading. I've not read Siegel's script, but the rest I have. This is a good choice, I have no qualms. It seems the Screenplay race is decided. Dammit, when even these categories get dull and predictable....
BAFTA
The BAFTAs announced today, and that's always interesting. They allow double nominees in acting categories, say "FUCK YOU" to category fraud, and have the tendency to surprise us all. Even if they have the same movies, they nominate them in unfamiliar categories. Let's just look.
BEST FILM: Slumdog Millionaire
Same nominees as the Oscars. It's getting to be a dull affair, isn't it? What's worse, I keep reading how it's the "under dog". Really? Do people not know what that word means?
BEST DIRECTOR: Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
Defeated Stephen Daldry (The Reader), Clint Eastwood (Changeling), David Fincher (Benjamin Button), and Ron Howard (Frost/Nixon). It makes sense. He's the front-runner, one of two Brits nominated. Plus, Boyle's done a lot for British cinema. And he's the front-runner.
BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Martin McDonagh, In Bruges
Also-rans: Dustin Lance Black's Milk, Philippe Claudel's I've Loved You So Long, The Coens' Burn After Reading, J. Michael Straczynski's Changeling. I was right. It really is All Awesome on the McDonagh Front. Much admiration for this pick.
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: Simon Beaufoy, Slumdog Millionaire
Beat out David Hare for The Reader, Justin Haythe for Revolutionary Road, Peter Morgan for Frost/Nixon, Eric Roth for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. So, now he's won everything. And he'll get the Oscar, too. Beaufoy, by the way, also wrote Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day, a film deeply admired here (Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Actress, Frances McDormand). So now that I know that, awesome!
BEST FILM NOT IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE: I've Loved You So Long
Defeated The Baader Meinhof Complex, Gomorrah, Persepolis, Waltz with Bashir. This movie wasn't even in contention for this category at the Oscars. Of these, I've only seen Persepolis. Last year. So...why am I commenting on this at all?
BEST ANIMATED FILM: WALL-E
Beating out Persepolis and Waltz with Bashir. Obv. WALL-E is so going to own this category.
BEST LEADING ACTOR: Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
Also nominated: Frank Langella (Frost/Nixon), Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire), Sean Penn (Milk), and Brad Pitt (Benjamin Button). Last year, BAFTA matched Oscar's acting categories four-for-four, so this may bode well for Rourke. The idea of a split between him and Penn for a win by Langella or Jenkins or Pitt is an interesting one, though. Like when Adrien Brody beat out Daniel Day-Lewis and Jack Nicholson in 2002.
BEST LEADING ACTRESS: Kate Winslet, The Reader
Not only did she win against herself for Revolutionary Road, but Meryl Streep (Doubt), Angelina Jolie (Changeling) and Kristin Scott Thomas (I've Loved You So Long) are also bridesmaids. After last year, this could bode well for Winslet, who always wins for The Reader when it's nominated. I'm still not completely convinced, of course, but that's because I like suspense.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
The Losers: Robert Downey, Jr. (Tropic Thunder), Brendan Gleeson (In Bruges), Philip Seymour Hoffman (Doubt), Brad Pitt (Burn After Reading). What an awesome lineup this was. That posthumous Oscar is looking like a done deal for Heath. Bring it, says I.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Nommies: Amy Adams in Doubt, Freida Pinto in Slumdog Millionaire, Tilda Swinton in Burn After Reading and Marisa Tomei in The Wrestler. BAFTA and I remain the only ones to nomainte Adams without Viola Davis. A Cruz win here is awesome, and a Cruz win at the Oscars would mean a spiritual win for Woody Allen. Which is, of course, amazing.
For complete results, check this out.
WGA
ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: Simon Beaufoy, Slumdog Millionaire (based upon the novel Q&A by Vikas Swarup)
Beat out Eric Roth's Benjamin Button, Peter Morgan's Frost/Nixon, John Patrick Shanley's Doubt, and The Nolans' The Dark Knight. Of course, it's the only nominated screenplay I haven't read. I haven't read the novel either, and that's also the one exception here. I need to read the damn script already. 'Twould be nice to know what the fuss is about.
ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Dustin Lance Black, Milk
Beat out Woody Allen's Vicky Cristina Barcelona, Robert Siegel's The Wrestler, Thomas McCarthy's The Visitor, The Coens' Burn After Reading. I've not read Siegel's script, but the rest I have. This is a good choice, I have no qualms. It seems the Screenplay race is decided. Dammit, when even these categories get dull and predictable....
BAFTA
The BAFTAs announced today, and that's always interesting. They allow double nominees in acting categories, say "FUCK YOU" to category fraud, and have the tendency to surprise us all. Even if they have the same movies, they nominate them in unfamiliar categories. Let's just look.
BEST FILM: Slumdog Millionaire
Same nominees as the Oscars. It's getting to be a dull affair, isn't it? What's worse, I keep reading how it's the "under dog". Really? Do people not know what that word means?
BEST DIRECTOR: Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
Defeated Stephen Daldry (The Reader), Clint Eastwood (Changeling), David Fincher (Benjamin Button), and Ron Howard (Frost/Nixon). It makes sense. He's the front-runner, one of two Brits nominated. Plus, Boyle's done a lot for British cinema. And he's the front-runner.
BEST ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY: Martin McDonagh, In Bruges
Also-rans: Dustin Lance Black's Milk, Philippe Claudel's I've Loved You So Long, The Coens' Burn After Reading, J. Michael Straczynski's Changeling. I was right. It really is All Awesome on the McDonagh Front. Much admiration for this pick.
BEST ADAPTED SCREENPLAY: Simon Beaufoy, Slumdog Millionaire
Beat out David Hare for The Reader, Justin Haythe for Revolutionary Road, Peter Morgan for Frost/Nixon, Eric Roth for The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. So, now he's won everything. And he'll get the Oscar, too. Beaufoy, by the way, also wrote Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day, a film deeply admired here (Hollmann Award Nominee for Best Actress, Frances McDormand). So now that I know that, awesome!
BEST FILM NOT IN THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE: I've Loved You So Long
Defeated The Baader Meinhof Complex, Gomorrah, Persepolis, Waltz with Bashir. This movie wasn't even in contention for this category at the Oscars. Of these, I've only seen Persepolis. Last year. So...why am I commenting on this at all?
BEST ANIMATED FILM: WALL-E
Beating out Persepolis and Waltz with Bashir. Obv. WALL-E is so going to own this category.
BEST LEADING ACTOR: Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler
Also nominated: Frank Langella (Frost/Nixon), Dev Patel (Slumdog Millionaire), Sean Penn (Milk), and Brad Pitt (Benjamin Button). Last year, BAFTA matched Oscar's acting categories four-for-four, so this may bode well for Rourke. The idea of a split between him and Penn for a win by Langella or Jenkins or Pitt is an interesting one, though. Like when Adrien Brody beat out Daniel Day-Lewis and Jack Nicholson in 2002.
BEST LEADING ACTRESS: Kate Winslet, The Reader
Not only did she win against herself for Revolutionary Road, but Meryl Streep (Doubt), Angelina Jolie (Changeling) and Kristin Scott Thomas (I've Loved You So Long) are also bridesmaids. After last year, this could bode well for Winslet, who always wins for The Reader when it's nominated. I'm still not completely convinced, of course, but that's because I like suspense.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTOR: Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight
The Losers: Robert Downey, Jr. (Tropic Thunder), Brendan Gleeson (In Bruges), Philip Seymour Hoffman (Doubt), Brad Pitt (Burn After Reading). What an awesome lineup this was. That posthumous Oscar is looking like a done deal for Heath. Bring it, says I.
BEST SUPPORTING ACTRESS: Penelope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
Nommies: Amy Adams in Doubt, Freida Pinto in Slumdog Millionaire, Tilda Swinton in Burn After Reading and Marisa Tomei in The Wrestler. BAFTA and I remain the only ones to nomainte Adams without Viola Davis. A Cruz win here is awesome, and a Cruz win at the Oscars would mean a spiritual win for Woody Allen. Which is, of course, amazing.
For complete results, check this out.
Sunday, September 7, 2008
Wonderful, Woody!
Believe everything you've heard: Vicky Cristina Barcelona is Woody Allen's best in years. Great ensemble, beautiful cinematography, a funny and at times bleak script. Brilliant.
Vicky (Rebecca Hall) is a gal with a plan for her life: study in Spain, then return to New York to marry her dependable, milquetoast fiance (Chris Messina), live modestly and happily. Cristina (Scarlett Johansson) is a spontaneous girl who never knows what she wants, just what she doesn't want. What she doesn't want this time around is to miss out on a fascinating life with painter Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem). But life with this master seducer of women (he tries it on both girls) means life with his sexy, unhinged ex-wife Maria Elena (Penelope Cruz). And there's the set-up. Most of which is provided for us by a narrator.
Can I say that this is Woody's best work of the decade? It hits all the right notes without being as suffocatingly depressing as Match Point, and only lightly touches on the screwball aspects of Scoop. His last effort to combine drama and comedy in a love story, Melinda and Melinda was almost unwatchable for me; this, however, is a masterpiece.
Yes, the narrator tells us many things that we could see happen instead. But it worked for me, as it made the film more of an examination of passion and of the choices we make, rather than a straight-up drama about Continental neurotics. This and the menage a trois theme reminded me of Jules et Jim, clearly a large influence on this narrative. We get Juan Antonio/Vicky/Cristina, Juan Antonio/Cristina/Maria Elena, Vicky/Juan Antonio/Doug, and so on.
I was constantly amazed that a 72-year-old man wrote and directed this. There's so much passion, so much virility, so much youth! It's an incredibly sexy story, where a lot of the tension is more erotic than the actual sex. Not to say that the sex is dull or anything (good Lord, no), but just feeling the electricity between two characters is hot.
The acting is great. Scarlett Johansson does her usual bit here. You know, as much as I like her, she really is a limited actress. She does what she needs to do, but it's not as impressive as her co-stars' efforts. Javier Bardem is the most natural, instantly charming as the artiste with a rather fatalistic view of life. Penelope Cruz absolutely sizzles when she's on the screen, and as much as I loved Volver, I think this may be my favorite role of hers to date. Rebecca Hall is a solid Vicky; her arc is perhaps the most interesting, as it is one of sexual awakening. In a roomful of crazies, she's the one with a head on her shoulders, though maybe not quite as secure as she hopes.
And Patricia Clarkson, who only appears in, like, six scenes, manages to give the best performance in the film with one heartbreaking scene halfway through. Those hands, that face - they tell us a whole history, a tale of disappointment, of dreams deferred and hope all but gone. An incredible performance, truly, marking another Clarkson great for 2008.
OK, let me put it this way: my second favorite movie of all time is Everyone Says I Love You, Woody Allen's 1996 musical that also dealt with love, threes, and narrators. And I will go so far as to declare that Vicky Cristina Barcelona is his best film since then. Sure, it has some flaws, but my GOD! that is still one bitchin' final product! ***3/4
Vicky (Rebecca Hall) is a gal with a plan for her life: study in Spain, then return to New York to marry her dependable, milquetoast fiance (Chris Messina), live modestly and happily. Cristina (Scarlett Johansson) is a spontaneous girl who never knows what she wants, just what she doesn't want. What she doesn't want this time around is to miss out on a fascinating life with painter Juan Antonio (Javier Bardem). But life with this master seducer of women (he tries it on both girls) means life with his sexy, unhinged ex-wife Maria Elena (Penelope Cruz). And there's the set-up. Most of which is provided for us by a narrator.
Can I say that this is Woody's best work of the decade? It hits all the right notes without being as suffocatingly depressing as Match Point, and only lightly touches on the screwball aspects of Scoop. His last effort to combine drama and comedy in a love story, Melinda and Melinda was almost unwatchable for me; this, however, is a masterpiece.
Yes, the narrator tells us many things that we could see happen instead. But it worked for me, as it made the film more of an examination of passion and of the choices we make, rather than a straight-up drama about Continental neurotics. This and the menage a trois theme reminded me of Jules et Jim, clearly a large influence on this narrative. We get Juan Antonio/Vicky/Cristina, Juan Antonio/Cristina/Maria Elena, Vicky/Juan Antonio/Doug, and so on.
I was constantly amazed that a 72-year-old man wrote and directed this. There's so much passion, so much virility, so much youth! It's an incredibly sexy story, where a lot of the tension is more erotic than the actual sex. Not to say that the sex is dull or anything (good Lord, no), but just feeling the electricity between two characters is hot.
The acting is great. Scarlett Johansson does her usual bit here. You know, as much as I like her, she really is a limited actress. She does what she needs to do, but it's not as impressive as her co-stars' efforts. Javier Bardem is the most natural, instantly charming as the artiste with a rather fatalistic view of life. Penelope Cruz absolutely sizzles when she's on the screen, and as much as I loved Volver, I think this may be my favorite role of hers to date. Rebecca Hall is a solid Vicky; her arc is perhaps the most interesting, as it is one of sexual awakening. In a roomful of crazies, she's the one with a head on her shoulders, though maybe not quite as secure as she hopes.
And Patricia Clarkson, who only appears in, like, six scenes, manages to give the best performance in the film with one heartbreaking scene halfway through. Those hands, that face - they tell us a whole history, a tale of disappointment, of dreams deferred and hope all but gone. An incredible performance, truly, marking another Clarkson great for 2008.
OK, let me put it this way: my second favorite movie of all time is Everyone Says I Love You, Woody Allen's 1996 musical that also dealt with love, threes, and narrators. And I will go so far as to declare that Vicky Cristina Barcelona is his best film since then. Sure, it has some flaws, but my GOD! that is still one bitchin' final product! ***3/4
Monday, July 14, 2008
Nine News
Penelope Cruz was feeling lonely. Here she was, taking on the role of the sexpot in the musical Nine, and still a mere Oscar Nominee. Everyone else on board was an Oscar Winner, which meant they were better and more important (although their movies didn't make significantly more money). How could Penny compete?
Then news came that the role of fashionista Stephanie was to be cast soon, and Penny crossed her fingers in hopes that Sienna Miller or Anne Hathaway would get the role. Why, they hadn't even been recognized by the Globes, much less the SAG or the Academy! Hooray!
Well, Stephanie is now cast. And, we hate to burst P.C.'s bubble, but the winner is a fellow Oscar Nominee. At least she's got company.
Yes, Kate Hudson, Supporting Actress Nominee for Almost Famous, will be sharing singing and dancing duties with Judi and the rest. Get excited!
By the way, does Rob Marshall just not believe in hiring anyone without an Award recognition of some sort?
Then news came that the role of fashionista Stephanie was to be cast soon, and Penny crossed her fingers in hopes that Sienna Miller or Anne Hathaway would get the role. Why, they hadn't even been recognized by the Globes, much less the SAG or the Academy! Hooray!
Well, Stephanie is now cast. And, we hate to burst P.C.'s bubble, but the winner is a fellow Oscar Nominee. At least she's got company.
Yes, Kate Hudson, Supporting Actress Nominee for Almost Famous, will be sharing singing and dancing duties with Judi and the rest. Get excited!
By the way, does Rob Marshall just not believe in hiring anyone without an Award recognition of some sort?
Tuesday, December 11, 2007
Casting Coup: Hercule Poirot's Christmas
*This one's from one of the Hollmann Holiday Extravangaza posts, my annual Christmas celebration. It is only one of two times that I have made a Casting Coup for an Agatha Christie. These are not the original pictures, by the way, as my hot-linking craziness from the LJ days had to be dispensed with.*
I know a few of you out there have never before read Hercule Poirot's Christmas. Thus, the following casting session may be confusing, or meaningless. However, I love Agatha Christie, and casts, and Christmas, and last time I checked, this was the HOLLMANN Holiday Extravaganza. So, allow me to be as selfish as Scrooge pre-Marley and Marley pre-death, and present my cast for the Agatha Christie classic Hercule Poirot's Christmas.
Synopsis (from us.agathachristie.com):
It is Christmas Eve. The Lee family reunion is shattered by a deafening crash of furniture, followed by a high-pitched wailing scream. Upstairs, the tyrannical Simeon Lee lies dead in a pool of blood, his throat slashed. But when Hercule Poirot, who is staying in the village with a friend for Christmas, offers to assist, he finds an atmosphere not of mourning, but of mutual suspicion. It seems everyone had their own reason to hate the old man...
THE LAW
Colonel Johnson
Who is He: Chief Constable of Yorkshire and friend of Poirot's. "I know criminals. Chicken-livered, most of them."
Originally played by: Nobody. In the TV version, Colonel Johnson was replaced with series (and short stories) regular Chief Inspector James Japp, who took the case for Scotland Yard with little or no argument from the locals, curiously enough. He was played by Philip Jackson.
My Choice: The great Bill Nighy, always an able supporting man, and who would work wonders with this small yet humorous role.
Superintendent Sugden
Who is He: Superintendent of the Middleshire Police. Johnson says he has little imagination.
Originally played by: Mark Tandy. Much younger than this photo, and with a mustache.
My Choice: Toby Stephens, who has at least four kick-ass roles to his credit: Bond villain (Die Another Day), murder suspect (Poirot: Five Little Pigs), Mr. Rochester (Jane Eyre), and Maggie Smith's son. Only, he too needs a mustache. He's the one on the left.
Better look:
Anywho, moving on...
THE VICTIM
Simeon Lee
Who is He: The patriarch of the Lee family, with legitimate and illegitimate family members all over the place. How much of a dick is he? He gathered his family together for Christmas just to psychologically torture them for his own amusement. He gets his throat sliced open.
Originally played by: Vernon Dobtcheff, who was also in Sidney Lumet's Murder on the Orient Express.
My Choice: An aging family patriarch with a wicked sense of humor? Hmm, let me think.
THE FAMILY
Alfred Lee
Who is He: The eldest son. Kind of a pushover, since he still lives at home and serves his father like a Nubian slave. Hates his brother Harry. Simeon hated him because he was boring.
Originally played by: Simon Roberts.
My Choice: Academy Award Nominee Kenneth Branagh
Lydia Lee
Who is She: Alfred's wife, "an energetic, lean greyhound of a woman", stronger than her husband. She at least tells Simeon what she really thinks of him.
Originally played by: Catherine Rabett, who was on "You Rang, M'Lord?", my favorite Britcom of all time. More importantly, she played Elizabeth in Frankenstein Unbound.
My Choice: She even looks like an energetic, lean greyhound of a woman. Academy Award Winner Cate Blanchett.
George Lee
Who is He: An MP, if you can believe it, which means he's pretty high up on the social food chain! Also, he's a bit of a moron, cheap, and just dull as dirt.
Originally played by: Eric Carte, who has not changed a bit since 1994.
My Choice: I tend to typecast, giving the role of a cheap snob to someone who can play snobs really well. Ladies and gentlemen, the manager of the Spice Girls, Richard E. Grant.
Magdalene Lee
Who is She: George's much younger wife, a blonde beauty with a blank expression. She spends like it's going out of style. Everyone thinks George a fool for marrying her.
Originally played by: Andree Bernard, who is still quite a beauty.
My Choice: Another beautiful, sexually-charged blonde, Sienna Miller.
David Lee
Who is He: The youngest son, he has yet to recover from his mother's death twenty years ago. Coming back home reverts him to a childlike state.
Originally played by: Nobody. His character, perhaps the most complex and interesting of all, was cut out of the film.
My Choice: The youngest guy here, Ewan McGregor.
Hilda Lee
Who is She: David's plain wife, extremely devoted to her husband, in an almost scary amount.
Originally played by: Well, without David, there could be no Hilda.
My Choice: Plain but with an extreme force of character, Academy Award Nominee Samantha Morton.
Harry Lee
Who is He: The prodigal son, a dishonest swindler and forger of cheques. Naturally, his father's favorite.
Originally played by: Brian Gwaspari. This is an old picture.
My Choice: Dougray Scott, whom you may remember from Ever After, starring Drew Barrymore. Or Desperate Housewives.
SURPRISE GUESTS
Pilar Estravados
Who is She: The estranged granddaughter of Simeon's dead daughter, who married and lived in Spain. Pilar is beautiful and full of gumption. She also becomes a favorite of her grandfather's.
Originally played by: Sasha Behar, who is actually kind of pretty in an exotic kind of way.
My Choice: The only beautiful Spanish actress old enough, yet young enough, to play this part: Academy Award Nominee Penelope Cruz.
Stephen Farr
Who is He: A mysterious stranger from South Africa, claiming to be the son of an old family friend. But who is he, really? Can he be trusted? He and Pilar are in a constant state of eye-fucking.
Originally played by: Nobody. Again, one of the three most intriguing characters was cut out. Only Pilar remained.
My Choice: That master of accents, Academy Award Nominee Tim Roth.
THE SERVANTS
Horbury
Who is He: Simeon's valet, a mysterious man who comes and goes as quietly as a mouse. Or a cat, even.
Originally played by: Ayub Khan-Din, and they turned it into a race thing.
My Choice: Let's go crazy, let's go wild, let's go self-referential. I say Poirot star David Suchet!
Tressilian
Who is He: The butler, he has been in the family for something like a thousand years. Knows all the secrets, but would be willing to die if it meant protecting the family.
Originally played by: John Horsley, who co-starred with Catherine Rabett on "You Rang, M'Lord?"
My Choice: The always-dependable 200-year-old Irish actor David Kelly.
THE DETECTIVE
I know, I know. This is really what you came to see.
Hercule Poirot
Who is He: The world's greatest detective.
Originally played by: Bunches of people, but in the original Christmas show, it was David Suchet.
My Choice: This is kind of cheating. There's a movie called Murder by the Book, in which Hercule Poirot and Agatha Christie have an intellectual duel of sorts. The Poirot in that is the Poirot in mine: Academy Award Nominee Ian Holm.
Don't worry, he's used to playing small people with French accents.
And that is my cast for Hercule Poirot's Christmas.
*It is here that I traditionally do a Christmas song, but the one I chose is so epically long... We're better off without it.*
I know a few of you out there have never before read Hercule Poirot's Christmas. Thus, the following casting session may be confusing, or meaningless. However, I love Agatha Christie, and casts, and Christmas, and last time I checked, this was the HOLLMANN Holiday Extravaganza. So, allow me to be as selfish as Scrooge pre-Marley and Marley pre-death, and present my cast for the Agatha Christie classic Hercule Poirot's Christmas.
Synopsis (from us.agathachristie.com):
It is Christmas Eve. The Lee family reunion is shattered by a deafening crash of furniture, followed by a high-pitched wailing scream. Upstairs, the tyrannical Simeon Lee lies dead in a pool of blood, his throat slashed. But when Hercule Poirot, who is staying in the village with a friend for Christmas, offers to assist, he finds an atmosphere not of mourning, but of mutual suspicion. It seems everyone had their own reason to hate the old man...
THE LAW
Colonel Johnson
Who is He: Chief Constable of Yorkshire and friend of Poirot's. "I know criminals. Chicken-livered, most of them."
Originally played by: Nobody. In the TV version, Colonel Johnson was replaced with series (and short stories) regular Chief Inspector James Japp, who took the case for Scotland Yard with little or no argument from the locals, curiously enough. He was played by Philip Jackson.
My Choice: The great Bill Nighy, always an able supporting man, and who would work wonders with this small yet humorous role.
Superintendent Sugden
Who is He: Superintendent of the Middleshire Police. Johnson says he has little imagination.
Originally played by: Mark Tandy. Much younger than this photo, and with a mustache.
My Choice: Toby Stephens, who has at least four kick-ass roles to his credit: Bond villain (Die Another Day), murder suspect (Poirot: Five Little Pigs), Mr. Rochester (Jane Eyre), and Maggie Smith's son. Only, he too needs a mustache. He's the one on the left.
Better look:
Anywho, moving on...
THE VICTIM
Simeon Lee
Who is He: The patriarch of the Lee family, with legitimate and illegitimate family members all over the place. How much of a dick is he? He gathered his family together for Christmas just to psychologically torture them for his own amusement. He gets his throat sliced open.
Originally played by: Vernon Dobtcheff, who was also in Sidney Lumet's Murder on the Orient Express.
My Choice: An aging family patriarch with a wicked sense of humor? Hmm, let me think.
THE FAMILY
Alfred Lee
Who is He: The eldest son. Kind of a pushover, since he still lives at home and serves his father like a Nubian slave. Hates his brother Harry. Simeon hated him because he was boring.
Originally played by: Simon Roberts.
My Choice: Academy Award Nominee Kenneth Branagh
Lydia Lee
Who is She: Alfred's wife, "an energetic, lean greyhound of a woman", stronger than her husband. She at least tells Simeon what she really thinks of him.
Originally played by: Catherine Rabett, who was on "You Rang, M'Lord?", my favorite Britcom of all time. More importantly, she played Elizabeth in Frankenstein Unbound.
My Choice: She even looks like an energetic, lean greyhound of a woman. Academy Award Winner Cate Blanchett.
George Lee
Who is He: An MP, if you can believe it, which means he's pretty high up on the social food chain! Also, he's a bit of a moron, cheap, and just dull as dirt.
Originally played by: Eric Carte, who has not changed a bit since 1994.
My Choice: I tend to typecast, giving the role of a cheap snob to someone who can play snobs really well. Ladies and gentlemen, the manager of the Spice Girls, Richard E. Grant.
Magdalene Lee
Who is She: George's much younger wife, a blonde beauty with a blank expression. She spends like it's going out of style. Everyone thinks George a fool for marrying her.
Originally played by: Andree Bernard, who is still quite a beauty.
My Choice: Another beautiful, sexually-charged blonde, Sienna Miller.
David Lee
Who is He: The youngest son, he has yet to recover from his mother's death twenty years ago. Coming back home reverts him to a childlike state.
Originally played by: Nobody. His character, perhaps the most complex and interesting of all, was cut out of the film.
My Choice: The youngest guy here, Ewan McGregor.
Hilda Lee
Who is She: David's plain wife, extremely devoted to her husband, in an almost scary amount.
Originally played by: Well, without David, there could be no Hilda.
My Choice: Plain but with an extreme force of character, Academy Award Nominee Samantha Morton.
Harry Lee
Who is He: The prodigal son, a dishonest swindler and forger of cheques. Naturally, his father's favorite.
Originally played by: Brian Gwaspari. This is an old picture.
My Choice: Dougray Scott, whom you may remember from Ever After, starring Drew Barrymore. Or Desperate Housewives.
SURPRISE GUESTS
Pilar Estravados
Who is She: The estranged granddaughter of Simeon's dead daughter, who married and lived in Spain. Pilar is beautiful and full of gumption. She also becomes a favorite of her grandfather's.
Originally played by: Sasha Behar, who is actually kind of pretty in an exotic kind of way.
My Choice: The only beautiful Spanish actress old enough, yet young enough, to play this part: Academy Award Nominee Penelope Cruz.
Stephen Farr
Who is He: A mysterious stranger from South Africa, claiming to be the son of an old family friend. But who is he, really? Can he be trusted? He and Pilar are in a constant state of eye-fucking.
Originally played by: Nobody. Again, one of the three most intriguing characters was cut out. Only Pilar remained.
My Choice: That master of accents, Academy Award Nominee Tim Roth.
THE SERVANTS
Horbury
Who is He: Simeon's valet, a mysterious man who comes and goes as quietly as a mouse. Or a cat, even.
Originally played by: Ayub Khan-Din, and they turned it into a race thing.
My Choice: Let's go crazy, let's go wild, let's go self-referential. I say Poirot star David Suchet!
Tressilian
Who is He: The butler, he has been in the family for something like a thousand years. Knows all the secrets, but would be willing to die if it meant protecting the family.
Originally played by: John Horsley, who co-starred with Catherine Rabett on "You Rang, M'Lord?"
My Choice: The always-dependable 200-year-old Irish actor David Kelly.
THE DETECTIVE
I know, I know. This is really what you came to see.
Hercule Poirot
Who is He: The world's greatest detective.
Originally played by: Bunches of people, but in the original Christmas show, it was David Suchet.
My Choice: This is kind of cheating. There's a movie called Murder by the Book, in which Hercule Poirot and Agatha Christie have an intellectual duel of sorts. The Poirot in that is the Poirot in mine: Academy Award Nominee Ian Holm.
Don't worry, he's used to playing small people with French accents.
And that is my cast for Hercule Poirot's Christmas.
*It is here that I traditionally do a Christmas song, but the one I chose is so epically long... We're better off without it.*
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